Deon Richmond credited as playing...
Malik
- Catherine: Can I ask you a question? Why is it then whenever I tell a guy to put it wherever they want, they always stick it in my ass?
- Malik: Damn.
- Jake: That's way too much information for me, Catherine.
- Catherine: Oh no Jake. Way too much information would be telling you that whenever they're done I always take a huge dump.
- Malik: Shit.
- Catherine: On their chest.
- Malik: Oh, that is whack.
- Malik: What are you doing here?
- Other black guy at party: What do you mean?
- Malik: I am supposed to be the only black guy at this party.
- Other black guy at party: Oh, damn. Shit.
- Malik: I know, I know.
- Other black guy at party, Malik: [Together] It's whack.
- Jake: What about her?
- [indicating hunchback girl walking by]
- Austin: So baby's got a little back. Hunch, that is. Naah, way too easy.
- Jake: OK.
- [indicates hippy albino girl playing guitar]
- Albino Folk Singer: [singing] I have no pigment...
- Austin: Any girl with a guitar is hot.
- Albino Folk Singer: [continues singing] I need sunscreen...
- Austin: Granted, she's a hippy albino. She could still be prom queen.
- Jake: OK, uh, what about the Fratelli sisters?
- [indicates awkward Siamese twins conjoined at the head]
- Austin: So they're slightly disfigured and connected at the head. But combined, those two make up one pretty decent chick.
- Reggie Ray: Yeah, I'd do 'em.
- Austin: I know you would, Reggie Ray. But no, I'm looking for somebody who's really messed up. I'm talking about a real shitbomb.
- [Janie Briggs walks by]
- Austin: Well, bombs away!
- Jake: No, no, no, no, anyone but her! Not... Janey Briggs! Guys, she's got glasses and a ponytail! Aw, look at that, she's got paint on her overalls, what is that? Guys, there's no way she could be prom queen!
- Malik: Damn! That shit's whack!
- Malik: Sure, Why Not?, After All I am Jus the token black guy. I'm jus supposed to smile and stay out of the conversation and say thing like: "Damn," "shit," and "that's whack."