Neil Patrick Harris credited as playing...
Lance
- Undercover Brother: You know what they say, behind every great black man...
- Conspiracy Brother: is the police.
- Undercover Brother: No.
- Smart Brother: A bunch of slow white athletes?
- Undercover Brother: No!
- White She-Devil: A cute butt.
- Undercover Brother: NO!
- Lance: Probable cause.
- [after killing three bodyguards with his bare hands in a temper tantrum]
- Lance: They shouldn't have called me a sissy.
- Lance: So let me get this straight; whenever a black guy does well, starts wearing Dockers, buys a few Celine Dion records, and sleeps with a White chick, you automatically say he's sold out?
- The Chief: That's enough, Lance!
- Lance: Always trying to shut the white man down.
- Conspiracy Brother: THAT'S RIGHT! That's Right!... Oh, that ain't right.
- Lance: It looks like the Source Awards in here...
- [Conspiracy Brother punches him]
- Conspiracy Brother: It does now!
- Lance: Chief, and various brother agents. I owe all of you a huge apology. I just watched a show, ummm, Roots, maybe you've heard of it? It taught me such a profound lesson about bigotry. I have stood on the sidelines of race relations long enough! I want to march down that field of oppression and kick that ball of bigotry right over the goalpost of intolerance!
- Lance: We gotta get the hell out of here! We're gonna die! We're all gonna die!
- Undercover Brother: [slaps Lance] Dig it...
- [slaps him again]
- Undercover Brother: ... and dig it hard!
- Lance: [softly] Daddy...