Totem

I thought that the basic premise for Totem was pretty good. Six teenagers find themselves at a cabin. Three will kill. Three will die. Granted, they told the whole plot rather than showed it, but come on. This flick is all about camp. A little bit of gore, a little bit of humor, some silly monsters and a really out of place dream sequence (no shower scene?) I was even lucky enough to get another cheesy B movie on the same disc. Not a bad deal for a night of popcorn and a few tongue-in-cheek laughs.

I knew I was in trouble, when the production company for this movie showed absolutely zero production value trailers, as "coming soon" attractions. Of course, it can be said that TOTEM is a thinking person's movie. It left me thinking "why did I spend good money renting this?" I also thought: "IMDb will need to add zero to their ratings scale, if more movies like this are made." The paper thin plot involves 6 teens (inexplicably) drawn to this cabin in the middle of nowhere. They can't escape because of some invisible shield, as the viewer is informed through a very talky script. In fact, that's what most of this movie is, talk, talk and more talk. The fleeting scenes where any action occurs, seems almost coincidental. The special effects look like something performed in a grammar school production. Good grief, these kids are dull. They're NOT even nubile, which seems to be a prerequisite for teen/horror flicks! Kind viewer beware of the "TOTEM"-Of course, I mean the movie- not the object of it. You have been warned.

This 64 minute nigthmare movie is just plain boring, dumb and utterly horrible. David Decoteau (under and alias: for good reason), "directs" this mess of a movie. Poor Acting, bad directing, terrible editing, pathetic looking puppets: COME ON, WE CAN SEE THE STRINGS!!! Stay far away from this garbage. This movie will possibly make you dumber for watching it.

Charles Band, of course.

I found this cheesy direct to video effort under the "Totem Asesino" (translated to English is "Killer Totme"). As the title suggested, I expected a B-cheesy flick with some involuntary humor and unintentionally funny situations.

Well, I got exactly what I expected. The plot is non sense and deals with six teens (only one attractive blonde girl), who find themselves trapped in a cabin a la "Evil Dead" just to be killed (?) by an evil force commanded by a Totem.

Well, the Totem eventually makes an appearance as a cheesy horrible monster but that's another story.

This movie provides the usual Full Moon cheese plus some minimal but decent gore and horrible acting so, if you are into Full Moon you could enjoy it.

If you are not in the mood for typical Full Moon entertainment you will likely hate this movie. I'm like to suffer and that's why I rented this one a few years ago. I guess I should rent in other places other than Blockbuster...

Group of people finds themselves unexplicitly drawn to a cabin out in the middle of nowhere. Once they get there, they discover that they can't leave the cabin as it is now surrounded by an invisible force field and a weird totem seems to be killing them off. Cheap, slow paced (even at 80 mins.) flick from Full Moon Productions is one of their worst efforts to date. Bad effects, wide eyed acting, not to mention an awful premise sink it.

Rated R; Violence & Profanity.