Demons at the Door

Ok, first of all, this b-movie is very very bad. I don't know what kind of a retarded bunch of lobotomized apes could ever conceive this utter sh*t, but what the hell, what's done is done, and I'm here to review this piece of crap.

The film starts with this prologue with a corny voiceover and Star Wars like words against a space backdrop (the voice and the words aren't even synchronized!) The story is very lame, basically telling about the war between Lucifer and God and how Lucifer is banished to hell, and then comes this Eye of Satan (or what have you) which supposedly frees the Devil and his demons so that they can enslave mankind (Is it just me or does this sound like Lord of the Rings)

Anyways, we cut to some place in a CGI Middle East where archaeologists dig for this eye of satan, something goes wrong when some very typical Islamic terrorist (which is a white guy, funny eh?) shoots a coupla scientists. The gate of hell is opened and a bunch of demons are released (They look like a cross between Predator AND Alien, not the kind of demons I had in mind)

The whole movie is just about how 2 macho marines and a female scientist (funny that they are always young twenty-something females with big tits) kill the demons.

This movie is terrible, but not a complete waste of time though, because there are some scenes which will leave you rolling on the floor laughing, such as the rapping devil and the black marine ripping each other off, funny how most of the demons and the monsters act like foul-mouthed thugs (there was a lot of "yeah i'm gonna F**k your daughter like how I f**ked the Blair Witch) The end of the movie is completely ludicrous and amusing, but I won't give it away.

The CGI in the movie is amongst the worst I've ever seen in any film, mini-series, pc game or flash animation. Some of the stuff could be done on microsoft paintbrush, but this altogether adds to the humor when you point out its utter trashiness. At some point (or most) I feel really bad for the director for creating this, or anyone involved for...umm, getting involved. But in the end it was a joyous experience. I give it a * out of *****, i would have give it a 0 if it didn't make me laugh this hard, which this film succeeded in doing.

ps. can't believe i wrote so much for this crap.

This movie sucks. It was not funny (like some of you are saying), and it is most definitely not scary. The acting sucks, the effects SUCKED, and so did everything else. The music didn't help much. It seemed as if they just had a soundtrack of one band and played it throughout the movie. Let me give you some examples of why it sucked: It has the Aqua Team Hunger force floating objects effect It's graphics of the monsters are worse than Evil Dead's. The acting was not good at all. A monster tried to have sex with a girl (which wasn't funny, just stupid) There was 'cool' music playing during dull scenes etc.. I recommend that you avoid this movie at all costs.

After watching this movie two thoughts crossed my mind. The first one being why did I rent this? the second one being. "I think i am dumber now then 2 hours before." This movie was so bad words are hard to find to explain it, but I will do my best. The dialog was horrible, full of really bad one liners. The plot sucked beyond all reason. The special effects were done with micro soft paint. If I had made this movie, I wouldn't show it to my friends, relatives, family or anybody. if i had anything to do with this movie I would keep it a secret to the grave. There is one scene where a monster comes out to attack one of the soldiers, but you can see his HUMAN FOOT. A boot must have fallen off or something, but it is right there in the open. This movie was a waste of my time. If I could get those two hours back of my life I would. This film should be burned and barred for life.

I actually rented this terrible excuse for no budget film because I saw it advertised on Fangoria Magazine. Being a big fan of the magazine, and of good low budget film making, I try to never have too high expectations when watching Indie flicks.

This however was worse than I ever expected! I am about as positive and forgiving a person as anyone can ever meet, but even I can't find anything good about this movie. The plot, the acting, special effects, camera work, everything about this movie is just an absolute catastrophe! What in the world can possess anyone to create something this lousy! I just can't explain any of the above to myself. I was actually embarrassed for the people involved in this project simply because I know I'm not the only one who's experienced this disaster...

To top things off - the director of this movie is an effects man for SOTA - a special effects company that in the past has done fantastic work. I figured no matter how bad the movie would be - at least it would have that going for it --- boy was I wrong! I've seen low budget flicks from three decades ago that had better effects than this - I think someone with no experience and a "do it yourself" make-up effects instruction book from the seventy's could've done a better job! You've been warned - stay away from this vile wreck! It really is the worse movie ever made!

i'm giving this movie 3 for 2 reason. I liked the soundtrack (ICP) and the main chick was hot. They used the same special effects that you see in Aqua Teen Hunger Force (for those of you who don't know it, it's a cartoon). The opening story was typed on a computer, hell my gf was even able to tell us what font they used lol. oh and the opening credits...LONGEST CREDITS EVER!!!! The acting was horrible and you'll never look at Satan the same way again. I was cracking up for a good part of the movie because it was just soooooo bad. If you're someone who likes to watch bad movies then you should see this. Especially if you have a thing for rapping demons.