David Kelly credited as playing...
Grandpa Joe
- Grandpa Joe: Mr. Wonka, I don't know if you remember me, but I used to work here in the factory.
- Willy Wonka: Were you one of those despicable spies who everyday tried to steal my life's work and sell it to those parasitic copy-cat candy-making cads?
- Grandpa Joe: No, sir.
- Willy Wonka: Then wonderful, welcome back.
- Willy Wonka: [about Violet grabbing the gum] I'd rather you didn't. There's still one or two things that are a...
- Violet Beauregarde: I'm the World Record holder in chewing gum. I'm not afraid of anything!
- [pops the gum in her mouth]
- Mrs. Beauregarde: How is it, honey?
- Violet Beauregarde: It's amazing! Tomato soup, I can feel it running down my throat!
- Willy Wonka: Yeah! Spit it out.
- Grandpa Joe: Young lady, I think you'd better...
- Violet Beauregarde: It's changing... roast beef and baked potato. Crispy skin and butter!
- Mrs. Beauregarde: Keep chewin' kiddo! My little girl's gonna be the first person in the world to have a chewing gum meal!
- Willy Wonka: Yeah. I'm just a little concerned about the...
- Violet Beauregarde: Blueberry pie and ice cream!
- Willy Wonka: That part.
- Veruca Salt: [staring at Violet] What's happening to her nose?
- [Violet keeps chewing and her nose starts turning blue]
- Mr. Salt: You're turning blue!
- Mrs. Beauregarde: Your whole nose has gone purple!
- Violet Beauregarde: [touching her nose] W-What do you mean?
- Mrs. Beauregarde: Violet, you're turning violet!
- [to Wonka; concerned]
- Mrs. Beauregarde: What's happening?
- Willy Wonka: Well, I told you I hadn't quite got it right, 'cause it goes a little funny when it gets to the dessert. It's the Blueberry Pie that does it. I'm terribly sorry!
- Violet Beauregarde: Mother, what's happening to me?
- [continues to turn blue and starts to grow]
- Grandpa Joe: She's swelling up!
- Charlie Bucket: Like a blueberry!
- Willy Wonka: [to Mrs. Beauregarde] I've tried it on, like, twenty Oompa-Loompas and each one ended up as a blueberry. It's just weird!
- Mrs. Beauregarde: But I can't have a blueberry as a daughter. How is she supposed to compete?
- Veruca Salt: You could put her in a county fair!
- [Wonka laughs]
- Grandpa Joe: I saw Willy Wonka with my own two eyes. I used to work for him, you know.
- Charlie Bucket: You did?
- Grandpa Joe: I did.
- Grandma Josephine: He did.
- Grandpa George: He did.
- Grandma Georgina: I love grapes.
- [Mike Teavee is taken away and Wonka moves towards the Great Glass Elevator with Charlie and Grandpa Joe]
- Willy Wonka: Now, how many children are left?
- Grandpa Joe: Mr. Wonka, Charlie's the only one left, now.
- Willy Wonka: [looks at Charlie] You mean, you're the only one?
- Charlie Bucket: Yes.
- Willy Wonka: What happened to the others?
- Charlie Bucket: But it didn't close forever, it's open right now.
- Mrs. Bucket: Ah, yes, well sometimes, when grown ups say "forever," they mean, "a very long time."
- Grandpa George: Such as, I feel like I've eaten nothing but cabbage soup forever.
- Mr. Bucket: Now pops...
- Grandma Josephine: The factory did close, Charlie.
- Grandpa Joe: And it seemed like it was going to be closed forever. Then, one day, we saw smoke rising from the chimneys. The factory was back in business!
- Charlie Bucket: Did you get your job back?
- Grandpa Joe: No. No one did.
- Charlie Bucket: But there must be people working there.
- Grandma Josephine: Think about it, Charlie. Have you ever seen a single person going into that factory? Or coming out of it?
- Charlie Bucket: No. The gates are always closed.
- Grandpa Joe: Exactly.
- Charlie Bucket: But then, who's running the machines?
- Mrs. Bucket: Nobody knows, Charlie.
- Mr. Bucket: Your mum and I thought, maybe you want to open your birthday present, tonight.
- Mrs. Bucket: Here you are.
- Charlie Bucket: Maybe I should wait till morning.
- Grandpa George: Like hell.
- Mr. Bucket: Pop.
- Grandpa Joe: All together we're 381 years old. We don't wait.
- Charlie Bucket: Are the Oompa Loompas really joking, Grandpa?
- Grandpa Joe: Of course they're joking. That boy will be fine.
- [looks worried]
- Willy Wonka: I've been longing to press that button for years. Well, here we go! Up and out!
- Grandpa Joe: But do you really mean...?
- Willy Wonka: Yeah, I do!
- Grandpa Joe: But it's made of glass! It'll smash into a million pieces!
- [Willy giggles]
- Willy Wonka: I invited five children into the factory and the one who is the least rotten would be the winner.
- Grandpa Joe: That's you, Charlie.
- Willy Wonka: So, what do you say? Are you ready to leave all this behind and come live with me at the factory?
- Charlie Bucket: Sure. Of course. I mean, it's all right if my family come too?
- Willy Wonka: Oh, my dear boy, of course they can't. You can't run a chocolate factory with a family hanging over you like an old, dead goose. No offense.
- Grandpa George: None taken, jerk.
- Willy Wonka: A chocolatier has to run free and solo. He has to follow his dreams. Gosh darn the consequences. Oh, look at me. I had not family, and I'm a giant success.
- Charlie Bucket: So if I go with you to the factory, I won't ever see my family again?
- Willy Wonka: Yeah. Consider that a bonus.
- Charlie Bucket: Then I'm not going. I wouldn't give up my family for anything. Not for all the chocolate in the world.
- Willy Wonka: Oh, I see. That's weird. There's other candy too besides chocolate.
- Charlie Bucket: I'm sorry, Mr. Wonka. I'm staying here.
- Willy Wonka: Wow. Well, that's just... unexpected... and weird. But I suppose, in that case, I'll just - Goodbye then. Sure you won't change your mind?
- Charlie Bucket: I'm sure.
- [pause]
- Willy Wonka: Okay. Bye.