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Sex Lives of the Potato Men (2004)

Johnny Vegas: Dave

Sex Lives of the Potato Men

Johnny Vegas credited as playing...

Dave

Quotes3

  • Dave: [Sees Ferris trying to do crazy paving] What happened here?
  • Ferris: It's crazy paving.
  • Dave: This isn't crazy paving Ferris, this is just shit.
  • Ferris: I was trying to... you know?
  • Dave: You've got no artistic vision here, have you? It's just a random fucking big mess.
  • Ferris: It's crazy paving, you just bung slabs down.
  • Dave: No, I think you're focusing too much on the crazy aspect, and not enough on the paving side of it.
  • Ferris: Have you come round here just to have a go at my crazy paving?
  • Dave: No, but...
  • Ferris: What then?
  • Dave: Nothing.
  • Ferris: [stands up and moves aside] You're standing on my string.
  • Dave: What kind of concrete are you using? Cause you know there's different kinds, don't ya?
  • Ferris: I'm not being funny Dave, but you're getting on my nerves.
  • Dave: I'm just saying there's different types of concrete. Use the wrong one and... you're fucked!
  • Ferris: It's just ordinary concrete!
  • Dave: Tolly is driving me round the twist. He never stops wanking. I just had to get out of there.
  • Ferris: Try living here with Joan. Twenty-four hours a day it's either blowjobs or crazy paving.
  • Dave: Look at us. Half-eleven on a Saturday morning. We shouldn't be standing here like this. We're young blokes! We should be living life to the full. We should be down the pub!
  • Poppy: What are you after?
  • Dave: Nothing. I thought we could go for a walk. I haven't really had time to talk to you that much.
  • Poppy: So that's your game, is it? Talking.
  • Dave: I thought it'd be nice, just me and you. Have a nice conversation. Go for a quick walk around the park.
  • Poppy: Dave, I hardly know you. I'm not just going to go walking around the park with you.
  • Poppy: Alright then, forget it.
  • Poppy: I'm having a few people around next week for group sex if you're interested.
  • Dave: If I wasn't so lazy, I'd become a workaholic.

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