Steve Buscemi credited as playing...
Angelo
- Nick Murder: Are you circumcised?
- Angelo: What?
- Nick Murder: Are you circumcised?
- Angelo: Circularized?
- Nick Murder: No, circumcised.
- Angelo: My circulation's fine.
- Nick Murder: No, are you circumcised?
- Angelo: I'd like to fucka woman tennis player. You know, with the outfit on. And a tennis ball stuck in her panties.
- Nick Murder: Are you circumcised?
- Angelo: Hell, no. That shit hurts. Somebody cuts my dick it better be for vengeance.
- Nick's Mother: Did I tell you his grandfather tried to have sex with me?
- Angelo: Really?
- Nick's Mother: I'm telling you. Told me my husband was a boy. That he could do things to me that I couldn't imagine.
- Angelo: Sexually?
- Nick's Mother: Well, yeah, sure. He wasn't talking about going to Jersey.
- Angelo: Mrs Murder. Nice to see you. How are you?
- Nick's Mother: Every breath is a victory.
- Nick Murder: Hi ya, Mom.
- Nick's Mother: Don't you, "Hi, Mom" me. I told you. I told you! In the sixth grade, I told you, "Never tell a woman your business. You just do your thing and you keep it to yourself!"
- Angelo: I'm not the type of guy who goes up to a woman says, "You want to go out with me? " and then takes his dick out. That's not my style. I'm no beast.
- Nick Murder: I'd be better off a fag.
- Angelo: Those guys are in shape. Randolph Scott was a fag.
- Nick Murder: Not Randolph Scott?
- Angelo: Yeah, him and Cary Grant.
- Nick Murder: Get out of here. Not in a million years!
- Angelo: The list is long. There's a lot of great fags.
- Nick Murder: She's a redhead.
- Angelo: Au naturel?
- Nick Murder: The whole megillah.
- Angelo: It's rare. They feel more. That's scientifically proven.
- Nick Murder: What?
- Angelo: You take a natural red versus a brunette. Right? And you prod them both with a jolt of electric shock, mild. The carrot-top's gonna need 20% more anesthesia.
- Nick Murder: To numb the pain?
- Angelo: Pain, pleasure, it's all nerve-related! The point is, they *feel* more. Nice as she is, red as her bush is, fuckable as she is, you gotta put the fire out, my friend! Attend to it! Stamp out that Benson & Hedges bitch once and for all.
- Angelo: It's cleaner. It's cleaner without the foreskin. Most guys in pornos, John Leslie nobody better.
- Angelo: It's no picnic being a guy. Right? It's hard. I mean, if I was a woman I would have been a prostitute. I broke up with Wanda. Her ass was a travesty. There's just some things you can't overlook.