Scream Bloody Murder

Our "starlets" are all cuties in the extreme (Shay, whatta doll!), our plot is rather weak and transparent, our effects are rather on the cheesy side, but hey, a buncha incredibly cliched schoolgirls are on their way to the "big dance", their van breaks down, and mayhem ensues. Lotsa exploitive laughs, no real skin, some cheesy girl on girl action, and we have a halfbaked, but darn tootin' funny flick. Highlights include the actress playing Parker, who is far and away the best thing talent wise here, our hick rescuer who exudes some rather goofy charm in his bumbling, and our innocent Shay, who looks like an escapee from the Facts of Life, but is charming nonetheless. Our lowlights include badgirl Star, sluttygirl Honey, and the driver who you were rooting for to be an early victim. If you watch with your tongue firmly in cheek, you'll enjoy it, if you have high hopes of a great thriller, you're gonna be sooooo disappointed.

How is it possible to screw up a movie involving girls in school uniforms and killings?

Somehow the producers of the movie figured out a way. A van-load of high-school girls who appear to be in their mid 20s run out of gas on a desert road and a hockey mask wearing redneck tow-truck driver tows them and their van to his garage, where deaths and other strange things being to happen. One girl is killed in a car compactor, another has an air pump shoved down her throat causing her to explode, a guy gets it up the ass from a forklift(!) and it's unclear if the inbred, redneck tow-truck-driver is responsible. Since many of the nighttime scenes were obviously filmed through a dark blue filter, it is easy to understand why the killer's identity might be unclear, ... but the final twist is actually revealed in the film's trailer. Any attempts at actual horror were given away in the film's trailer (it reveals the deaths of several main characters, as well as giving away the entire twist ending!)

If it was supposed to be a satire, lame double-entendres and obvious setups (guy with crutches, taking away the cellphones) sink this from the start. And film's soundtrack sounds like someone farting uncontrollably.

It might be worth a few unintended laughs to watch this once, and to check out the so-so looking girls, but anything more is asking too much.

A vanload of female students breaks down in the middle of absolutely nowhere. Luckily, a helpful hillbilly shows up with his tow truck. The vulnerable young girls are whisked back to the "End Of The Road" garage and salvage yard where things spiral hopelessly out of control.

SCREAM BLOODY MURDER is a non-scary, somewhat humorous horror movie parody that hits as much as it misses. When compared with other, far more expensive productions featuring similar subject matter, it's actually not too bad.

Is it dumb? Yes, but at least it seems to know how dumb it is, while making the most of its microscopic budget...

Terrible, terrible, terrible.

I can appreciate a good spoof, but this movie had me wincing all the way through. I'm 20 years old and I've done more professional stuff than this. Out-of-focus shots, too dark at times, terrible sound in some scenes and a REALLY annoying shifting white-balance (which means the image will change tones from one shot angle to another).

The whole thing was filmed by handycam and looked like a porno, from the costumes, to the actresses, to the plot. Scream Bloody Murder is a porn movie minus the actual porn!

The story was ridiculous and the ending downright stupid and nonsensical. I usually can appreciate a stupid-fun movie, but this is just way too horrible. Thank God I got to rent this for free.

2 out of 10! And that's on the strength of the uniforms alone ;).

Daniel

When I rented this, I was all ready for a good old-fashioned, old-school hack fest. Alas, I was bitterly disappointed.

I obviously didn't rent this movie for good acting or a believable plot. But I do require gore, and if there are going to be lots of hot women, I need a little gratuitous nudity. I got neither! A couple glops of fake blood and two women making out was it.

The film tries to overcome all of these dire shortfalls with comedy- sort of a mish-mash of gags and jokes paying homage to the horror genre as a whole. I chuckled a couple times, but they were the kind of chuckles that slip out when you are desperately seeking to be entertained.

Don't bother with this one. 2/10