Even by the low standards of the quickie softcore genre circa 1970, LOVE ME OR LEAVE is a poor example of entertainment. Rather it is filler, ground out by the exhibitor to fill up the screen between "real" movie bookings.
It is interesting that in the 1971-made self-serving soft porn "exposé" film BLUE MONEY, near the end of the film the nasty exhibitor yells at the porn producers "we're going to start making the movies ourselves". This Cosmos production puts that threat to the test, with embarrassing results.
John Keith, who can be funny on occasion (see HILLBILLY HONEYMOON), is at a complete loss this time, playing a lawyer named Mr. Stanley, and film consists of a series of interviews he conducts with potential clients, each cueing a sex flashback. He stumbles over his lines and even repeats them, and when it comes to the sex simulation he is limp as ever.
There are four main segments, each tediously directed in single, continuous take fashion to kill time. The oddest one is a matron who keeps repeating "my husband raped my daughter", but euphemistically it's never established whether hubby is in fact the girl's dad. She's supposed to be 13 years old, but looks quite legal in the flashback, notable merely for its cliché of a nude spanking leading to sex. Final segment is the dumbest, with a porn actress named Debbie Smith who is being charged with "conspiracy to commit oral copulation". There's no danger of such a charge being levied at the participants of this film, as fellatio scenes and sex couplings are strictly simulated. Basically, the fans are treated to full frontal nudity and split-beaver shots -what was par for the course in 1970.
Low point is an actress looking dazed at the camera waiting for shooting to begin, and we hear "Action!" yelled by the director, bringing her to life.
