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Dave the Barbarian (2004)

Danny Cooksey: Dave the Barbarian • An Invading Warrior • An Ox • ...

Dave the Barbarian

Danny Cooksey credited as playing...

Dave the Barbarian • An Invading Warrior • An Ox • Dancing Boy • Gribby • Man • Numb Clerk • Some Kid • Super Cool Ghost • Vender • Warrior 2

Quotes12

  • [repeated line]
  • Dave: Beejabbers!
  • Storyteller, Twinkle the Marvel Horse: Storyteller: And so, the battle rages on and on, month after month, year after year...
  • Dave: Uh, it's only been five minutes.
  • Storyteller, Twinkle the Marvel Horse: Storyteller: I don't know why I try.
  • [Dave is screaming and running around the world and comes across some polar bears fishing]
  • Dave: AHHHHHHHHH!
  • Polar Bear 1: What was that?
  • Polar Bear 2: If it ain't fish, I ain't interested, that's my motto.
  • Storyteller, Twinkle the Marvel Horse: I'd like to try out for the part... of the Grim Reaper... who ushers screaming souls into the next life...
  • Dave: There is no Grim Reaper in this play.
  • Storyteller, Twinkle the Marvel Horse: I could improvise!
  • Dave: Ready, Lula?
  • Lula the Magic Sword: I refuse to come out like this.
  • Dave: What's wrong?
  • Lula the Magic Sword: Her *ladyship* thought I needed a more "civilized" look.
  • [she comes out covered with...]
  • Dave: Are those roses?
  • Lula the Magic Sword: Yes.
  • Dave: Cause I'm ALLERGIC TO ROSES.
  • Dave: Why should I help her?
  • Fang: I think you already know the answer.
  • Dave: Right. Because Candy's my sister, and family is very important.
  • Fang: I was gonna say because if he didn't, I'd rip off his head and play volleyball with it, but I like his version better.
  • Dave: But I don't wanna be a barbarian!
  • Fang: You did when you were ten!
  • Dave: Yes, but I thought it meant a librarian that also cuts hair.
  • [performing a musical of his own making]
  • Dave: Alas, poor Danish. What is thy filling? Just ask the Danish prince. You're filled with...
  • [singing]
  • Dave: Cheese and sugar / cheese and sugar / with the texture / of a booger...
  • [fighting a dragon]
  • Dave: [to Lula] Come on! Do one of those magic energy blast dealies.
  • Lula the Magic Sword: What? And get a nasty letter from the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Dragons?
  • Dave: Can you keep him busy? I've got a plan.
  • Fang: You promise your plan isn't, "I bet I can get away while Fang keeps him busy"?
  • Dave: Promise.
  • Dave: [trying to hide Faffy from Strom the Slayer in a fish bowl] You're going to have to give up this whole *breathing* thing.
  • Dave: Go team!

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