Cree Summer credited as playing...
Foxxy Love • Old Woman • Aurora • Barbara • Captain Hero's Sister • Clara's Evil Stepmother • Daphne Blake • Farmer Wife • Foxxy Dark • Foxxy Phat • Foxxy Yella • Foxxy's Mother • Fran Drescher • Georgina Georgiopolis • Hindu Mother • Homeless Woman • Island Native • Jewel • Letta Lame • Lil' Foxxy • Ni-Pul • Pe-Ling • Queen of Mexico • See 'n Say • Slave Boy • Strawberry Sweetcake • Super Nanny • Xandir's Girlfriend
- Captain Hero: I could stick and stir any one of these broads, but I really wish we had one of those sexy Black chicks.
- Foxxy Love: [Opens door] Bling bling! Foxxy Love is in the house!
- Captain Hero: Damn, I am good! I wish we had a 12-year-old girl and a donkey!
- [camera shifts from the door to Captain Hero several times; nothing happens]
- Captain Hero: Damn.
- Princess Clara: What is this thing in my mouth? / It's slippery and it's slimy / Travelling down my slender virgin pink esophagus. / Some Black chick's tongue. / It's such a new sensation.
- Foxxy Love: I got a mayonnaise mama on my lickin' hole / And we've only just begun...
- Princess Clara: It's really quite thrilling...
- Foxxy Love: It's right. Now you know...
- Princess Clara: I can taste a filling...
- Foxxy Love: And it's solid gold...
- Princess Clara: I never dreamed I would be so willing / To let myself go.
- Foxxy Love: Tell me about it! / I'm totally frenching a racist ho!
- Princess Clara, Foxxy Love: This Black chick's tongue.
- Princess Clara: What a wonderful feeling.
- Foxxy Love: Damn, where'd this bitch get her earrings?
- Princess Clara: I've never had so much fun.
- Princess Clara, Foxxy Love: As with this Black chick's tongue.
- Captain Hero: How cool is this? / We've only been here a day / And I already find myself in a 3-way!
- Princess Clara: [about her octopussoir] Oh, please, please don't tell anybody. I'm afraid that I must ask you guys to keep my secret with a pinky swear!
- Foxxy Love: I pinky swear.
- Toot Braunstein: [They look at Toot] FINE! I pinky swear.
- [Clara's octopussoir also pinky swears]
- Captain Hero: [knocks on door] Clara, Toot told us that you have a monster for a vagina and we want to have a meeting about it.
- Princess Clara: How is that even possible?
- [Foxxy and Clara stare at Toot]
- Toot Braunstein: Oopsey-Tootsey! I couldn't help myself.
- Princess Clara: You're probably wondering about my octopussior... It's French.
- [in the confessional]
- Princess Clara: I've never shared my story with anyone before. It's all so... so personal. I told the girls that the only way I could get it out was through interpretive dance.
- [she then dances interpretively]
- Foxxy Love: Really? When you was but a child, your stepfather cast a curse on yo' vagina?
- Princess Clara: What? Weren't you paying attention?
- [demonstrates a move]
- Princess Clara: My evil step *mother*! *Mother* placed the curse on me!
- Toot Braunstein: Uh-duuuuuh!
- Foxxy Love: Now Foxxy Love did not want a riot to break out--even though she sho could use a new TV set. So, Foxxy decided to call a house meeting.
- Princess Clara: [in the confessional] The Producers told us that we must start a business of our choosing. I wanted to have a bake sale but the stereotypes had other ideas.
- Xandir: Let's open a hair salon!
- Foxxy Love: OOOH, we could shine shoes!
- Ling-Ling: I say full-release massage parlour that serves wok-fried puppies!
- Toot Braunstein: LET'S EAT POTATO SALAD!
- Foxxy Love: [the housemates must vote on whether or not to keep Foxxy] You know this vote is total crap. She was totally into it! You saw us tongue-bangin'!
- Captain Hero: Sorry, Foxxy, but if I vote you out now, I'll be one step closer to the million dollars!
- Foxxy Love: Million dollars? You know this ain't one of them kinda shows right? Ain't no prizes!
- Captain Hero: [aside in the confessional] Ah, silly Foxxy. She'll never win the million dollars with *that* kind of attitude!
- Foxxy Love: We'll always have Paris. That's what we called it when I smashed his penis with a lead model of the Eiffel Tower
- Foxxy Love: Come on, people! Fight the power! We know you're a little games producer! Mama didn't raise no fool, and Daddy didn't raise me at all!
- Foxxy Love: [on attending Wooldoor's funeral] That was the first funeral I'd been to in a long time that did not take place in my womb.
- Foxxy Love: [on the producers' word edits] Goddamn white producers with their goddamn white flashes. They can edit us to make us say whatever they want.
- [edited]
- Foxxy Love: My... thang... is... made... out... of... bacon.
- [after the editing]
- Foxxy Love: STOP IT! Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah. My thang's 100% pure bacon.