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Bettye Ackerman and Dan Dailey in The Alfred Hitchcock Hour (1962)

Alfred Hitchcock: Self - Host

The Tender Poisoner

The Alfred Hitchcock Hour

Alfred Hitchcock credited as playing...

Self - Host

Quotes3

  • [afterword]
  • Self - Host: I like that ending very much, but unfortunately, it is not consistent with the facts of the case, for the police eventually learned the truth about Bartel's villainy. Before leaving you, I wish to mention that although a poison such as the one mentioned in the story does exist, it is not considered in the public interest to identify it. Therefore, it was given a fictitious name. I mention this to save discontented husbands the trouble of searching fruitlessly through medical books. Until next week, good night.
  • [intermission - Hitchcock is still mixing the broken glass and tastes his brew]
  • Self - Host: We still have a long way to go. Join me again after the following local interruption.
  • [break]
  • Self - Host: I know I should label everything, but those station breaks defy description. Now for the next minute. It is not toxic, but it is highly soporific, so be careful. If you are a heavy sleeper, you could miss the entire second half of our play.
  • [introduction - Hitchcock is behind a pharmacy counter]
  • Self - Host: Good evening and welcome to The Friendlier Pharmacy. I've recently found a very lucrative use for my empties.
  • [walks over to brewing pot]
  • Self - Host: I use them to make a sugar substitute.
  • [throws bottles into pot]
  • Self - Host: Ground glass. Excellent for men and women who prefer a spouse-free diet. Also very effective for getting rid of unwanted heirs. Best of all, a doctor's prescription is not required, at least not before it is swallowed. Tonight's story is entitled "The Tender Poisoner". As you see, I have not been misleading you. And, consistent with this policy of frankness, I must warn you that this next minute may be hard to swallow, but be brave.
  • [mixes broken glass]

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