Alfred Hitchcock credited as playing...
Self - Host
- [intermission]
- Self - Host: Television seems to be dedicated to the proposition that the viewer's memory span is only thirty minutes long. So now we must interrupt to tell you again what station you are watching, after which our story will continue.
- [introduction - Hitchcock puts a 'Ladies' sign on one door and a 'Tigers' sign on another door]
- Self - Host: As you see, I'm devising a new parlor game. It is based on the story of the young man who had to choose between two doors. He was told that behind one was a beautiful lady, behind the other, a ferocious tiger. Of course, my personal theory is that he knew which door each was behind, but was still in a dilemma. You see, he couldn't remember whether they had said the lady was beautiful and the tiger ferocious or that the lady was ferocious and the tiger beautiful. He was a very confused young man, just as I am at this moment. This should make a perfect party game. It is the best way I found to thin out a guest list without hurting anyone's feelings. Our main attraction this evening is not about tigers, but we do have two ladies and one very interesting door. It is at the other end of this dismal one-minute corridor.
- [afterword]
- Self - Host: Since you didn't seem to mind that two of our principals were disposed of during the course of the play, I'm certain you shall be able to bear up under the news that Mrs. Daniels did not live happily ever after. Justice triumphed and now she is behind a locked door. This concludes my portion of the program. You may think I've made this test too easy by putting signs on the doors. I don't think so.
- [points to 'Tigers' door]
- Self - Host: There's a tiger in here and in here...
- [opens 'Ladies' door and a tiger is heard growling]
- Self - Host: Lady tigers.