Lee Ingleby credited as playing...
Stan Shunpike
- Stan Shunpike: What you doin' down there?
- Harry: I fell over.
- Stan Shunpike: What you fell over for?
- Harry: I didn't do it on purpose.
- Stan Shunpike: Well come on then! Let's not wait for the grass to grow!
- Stan Shunpike: Take her away, Ern.
- Shrunken Head: [With a Jamaican accent] Yeah, take it away, Ernie! Fasten your safety belts, clench your buttocks! It's going be a bumpy ride!
- Harry: [in reference to Sirius Black on the front cover of the Daily Prophet] Who is that? That man?
- Stan Shunpike: Who is that?... Who is... THAT is Sirius Black that is! Don't tell me you've never been hearing of Sirius Black?
- [Harry shakes his head]
- Stan Shunpike: He's a murderer. Got himself locked up in Azkaban for it.
- Harry: How did he escape?
- Stan Shunpike: Well that's the question, isn't it? He's the first one who did it. He was a big supporter of You-Know-Who. Reckon you've heard of him?
- Harry: Yeah... him I've heard of.
- Stan Shunpike: What did you say your name was again?
- Harry: I didn't.
- Stan Shunpike: Well, whereabouts are you headed?
- Harry: The Leaky Cauldron! That's in London.
- Stan Shunpike: D'you hear that, Ern? The Leaky Cauldron, that's in London.
- Shrunken Head: Ah, the Leaky Cauldron! If you have the pea soup, make sure you eat it before it eats you!
- Stan Shunpike: Welcome to the Knight Bus, emergency transport for the stranded witch or wizard. My name is Stan Shunpike and I will be your conductor this evening.
- [while hurtling through London in the Knight Bus]
- Harry: But the Muggles! Can't they see us?
- Stan Shunpike: Muggles? They don't see nothing, do they?
- Shrunken Head: No, but if you jab them with a fork, they feel it!
- [laughs]
- Stan Shunpike: [on the Knight Bus with Harry, who is looking around] Come on, come on, move on!
- [clears throat, gives Harry a ticket, and knocks on the window next door]
- Stan Shunpike: Take her away, Ern.
- Shrunken Head: [next door] Yeah! Take it away, Ernie! It's going to be a bumpy ride!
- [Ernie starts up the Knight Bus and drives it quite quickly while things slide back and forth]
- Shrunken Head: Ha Ha Ha Ha!
- Shrunken Head: [to Harry] What did you say your name was again?
- Harry: I didn't!
- Stan Shunpike: Well, whereabouts are you headin'?
- Harry: The Leaky Cauldron. That's in London.
- Stan Shunpike: Did ya hear that, Ern? The Leaky Cauldron. That's in London.
- [laughs]
- Shrunken Head: Ah, the Leaky Cauldron! Hey, if you have the pea soup, make sure you eat it before it eats you!
- [laughs]
- Harry: But the Muggles! Can't they see us?
- Stan Shunpike: Muggles? They don't see nothing, do they?
- Shrunken Head: No, but if you jab them with a fork they feel it!
- [laughs]
- Shrunken Head: Ernie, little old lady at twelve o'clock!
- [bus stops for old lady to cross, while Harry smashes into the window]
- Shrunken Head: Ten... Nine... Eight... Seven... Six... Five... Four... Three... Three and a half... Two... One and three quarters, yes!
- [little old lady finally passes and bus moves on]