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Ashton Kutcher and Brittany Murphy in Just Married (2003)

Brittany Murphy: Sarah

Just Married

Brittany Murphy credited as playing...

Sarah

Photos13

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Quotes20

  • Tom: Okay, whatever. Listen, you get guests here from all over the world, it's up to you to have some American on your signs.
  • Sarah: He means English.
  • Sarah: [to Tom] We were evicted from a five star hotel, given the boot and now we're yelling at each other well not really, I'm yelling! I'm sorry I want to go home.
  • Tom: [weilding a fire poker] Hello Peter! So happy you could join us!
  • Sarah: Tom what are you doing?
  • Tom: I was thinking, that it's time for Peter and I to TANGO!
  • [smashes vase with poker]
  • Peter: He's crazy! See you have no furture with this guy.
  • Sarah: Peter, shut up. Tom you're acting like a crazy person.
  • Tom: Oh yeah? Well, maybe that's cause I just got hit in the head with a ten-pound ashtray !
  • [shrugs shoulders]
  • Peter: I'm warning you Leizak
  • [strikes a kung fu stance]
  • Peter: I studied karate with a Grand Master.
  • Tom: Yeah? Well I sure hope he showed ya how to pull a fire poker outta your ass!
  • Tom: Are you going to tell me what really happened with Peter?
  • Sarah: Are you going to tell me what really happened with red bra?
  • Tom: Nothing happened
  • Sarah: I hope you used a condom
  • Tom: I hope Peter used a condom
  • Sarah: I'm sorry, they don't make condoms that big.
  • Tom: That's funny
  • [to a fellow passenger]
  • Tom: we've got a comedian here
  • Sarah: You wanna hear something funny, I'm moving out when we get back
  • Tom: I'm just gonna stop talking
  • [The other passengers clap]
  • Sarah: I miss doing time in prison with you.
  • Sarah: [crying on wedding night] Tomorrow my parents are going to know I'm not a virgin anymore!
  • Tom: You haven't been a virgin since college.
  • Sarah: Yeah, but tomorrow they're going to know for sure.
  • Sarah: Tom, you're acting like a crazy person!
  • Tom: Well, *maybe* it's cuz I just got hit in the *head* with a ten pound *ashtray*!
  • [Shrugs his shoulders sarcastically]
  • Sarah: [to customs agent] No, but my husband does have two pounds of hash in his rectum.
  • Tom: Maybe we should just have sex.
  • Sarah: Call me crazy, but I'm not in the mood to make love to you.
  • Sarah: Grazie, grazie, grazie
  • [slaps man helping her up]
  • Sarah: Grazie, grazie god dammit.
  • Tom: HOOKER!
  • Sarah: MURDERER!
  • Tom: I specifically asked for a compact.
  • Sarah: This is a European compact.
  • Tom: No, this is a Ringling Brothers compact! I don't understand it. I loooked at the brochure and it had a Fiesta on the cover, not a Bingo!
  • Sarah: Baby, just floor it.
  • Tom: I *am* flooring it! If I pushed any harder, my foot would blow through the floor and we would be Flintstone-ing our asses there!
  • Sarah: Cheese and rice.
  • [Outside bathroom]
  • Stewardess: Return to your seat please.
  • Sarah: [Inside bathroom] Just a minute.
  • Stewardess: Return to your seat now, please.
  • Sarah: [angrly] Beat it, Stew!
  • Stewardess: Return-
  • [they both knock on the door]
  • Stewardess: Playtime is over, children.
  • [the stewardess knocks on the door, Sarah imitates her, she imitates her again, they both knock once, Tom and Sarah knock the door into her face]
  • Sarah: Is that a Thunderstick A-200o
  • Tom: When did you become an expert?
  • Sarah: I told you about that night in college.
  • Tom: But you never told me about the hardware.
  • Sarah: Getting a visual
  • Tom: We gotta charge this thing
  • Sarah: That plug won't fit in European outlet.
  • Tom: I'll make it fit.
  • Sarah: Don't force it.
  • Tom: Hey, we're in this together.
  • Sarah: Do you have four guys staring at your boobies right now? No.
  • Sarah: Tom, have you ever not told me something cause you were afraid of how I would react? Like have you ever not told me the truth about anything?
  • Tom: Like when I told you I liked your brother?
  • Sarah: This is serious Tom.
  • Tom: I am serious, I really don't like him.
  • Tom: So, everyone thinks we're crazy for doing this, huh?
  • Sarah: Since when do we care what people think.
  • Sarah: [after hitting a snowbank] Great, now we get to freeze to death.
  • Sarah: Turn off your brights, jackass!

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