Lucille Ball credited as playing...
Self - now a producer for NBC
- Johnny Carson: Don't tell me you're the one that has to find a new pilot for Don Rickles?
- Lucille Ball: No. I'm here to do a comedy show.
- [Sitting in Lucy's office, Johnny Carson is startled by a loud, warbling bird call]
- Lucille Ball: Quiet, Clyde!
- Johnny Carson: Clyde?
- Lucille Ball: Fred Silverman gave me a live peacock to remind me that I'm now at NBC.
- Lucille Ball: All my old shows are running morning, noon and night. If I went back, I'd be so busy rehearsing I wouldn't be able to watch my old shows morning, noon, and night.
- Lucille Ball: Mr. Silverman, may I get you something? Scotch and soda? Bourbon and water? Milk and cookies?
- Fred Silverman - the President of NBC: I've been a fan of yours since you started, Miss Ball.
- Lucille Ball: Oh? You had a TV set in your nursery?
- Johnny Carson: Even when Milton Berle was Mr. Television, the network gave him the pink slip.
- Lucille Ball: Yeah, and he's still wearing it. It's amazing what some of these stars get for just showing up. Oh, not you, Johnny. You deserve every penny. You keep more people up at night than Mexican food.
- Lucille Ball: I played your secretary for so long, I'd feel uncomfortable giving you orders.
- Himself - Lucille's production assistant: Nonsense. When you played my secretary on "The Lucy Show" you always gave me more orders than I ever gave you.
- Lucille Ball: [about Gene Kelly and Donald O'Connor's friendship] Who could ever forget you two in "Singing Up a Storm"?
- Gene Kelly: It was called "Singin' in the Rain".
- Lucille Ball: Oh? You made a sequel?
- Lucille Ball: Don't you think people will believe you as a father?
- Donald O'Connor: My own kids don't.
- Himself - Lucille's production assistant: You have children, huh?
- Donald O'Connor: Oh, yes, four. Two boys, a girl, and one that won't tell us what it is."
- Lucille Ball: I'm going to trust my own instincts. The public is fed up with computers deciding what they want to see.