Shia LaBeouf credited as playing...
Stanley
- The Warden Walker: Stanley, won't you just open it? Just let me see what's inside it, please!
- Stanley: Excuse me?
- Mr. Pendanski: You are here on account of one person; do you know who that one person is?
- Stanley: Yeah, my no-good-dirty-rotten-pig-stealing-great-great-grandfather, that's who it is.
- Mr. Pendanski: No, you.
- Stanley: Man how did she know my name?
- Zig-Zag: Oh, man, she's got the whole place wired. Oh yeah, she has these little cameras and microphones all over the place. In the tent, in the rec room, in the showers.
- Stanley: They're not in the showers.
- Squid: Oh don't listen to him. I read his file. It said he suffers from, um, oh. acute paranoia.
- Magnet: So I guess that means she watches me everyday, huh.
- Armpit: Man, he said cameras and microphones, not microscopes.
- Zig-Zag: What color was it's blood?
- Stanley: I-I don't know. I couldn't tell.
- Zig-Zag: I wish I'd a seen it. Bam!
- Magnet: If Mr. Sir didn't shoot it, Stanley, you'd be in the hole.
- Zig-Zag: Don't you know each one's got exactly 11 spots?
- Squid: Yeah, man, but if you ever get close enough to count 'em, you're dead.
- Armpit: Look, it's the lizards we're workin' for, man. We build their houses for 'em. I mean, yesterday I saw 10 of 'em in one hole.
- Squid: We ain't diggin' for no lizards
- Armpit: What we diggin' for then man?
- X-Ray: Like Mr. Sir said, we diggin' to build some character.
- Judge: I could send you to jail and not lose one bit of sleep over it. But I don't know what good that would do. There is currently a vacancy at Camp Green Lake. They help troubled youth build character. The choice is yours: Camp Green Lake or jail.
- Stanley: Uh... well, um... I've never been to camp before.
- Judge: Eighteen months - Camp Green Lake, son.
- [bangs gavel]
- [first lines]
- Stanley: [after being hit by a falling pair of shoes] All my life, I seemed to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. My grandpa, Stanley Yelnats Il, says it's all because of this 150-year-old curse. Now, I don't really believe in the family curse, but when things go wrong, it kind of helps if you can blame it on something. And for me, things went wrong a lot. Grandpa says our destiny is sealed. Could a pair of shoes falling from the sky really be part of my destiny?