Satanic

Very uneven lowish production values hurt, but there are some good ideas in the script and the Combs and Scrimm are fine in basically not much roles,probably lured by director Dan Golden's knowing them than by the material, though both have been in worse roles in worse movies. James Russo's part is almost as "big" but as Combs but they didn't have the guts to claim he stars in the movie. However using Combs name first on the box is exploitation in the worst sense he's barely in the movie. Scrimm has a bigger but ultimately no pay off role. Movie is about OUJA board more than anything Satanic other than the credit sequence in lava-hell landscape.

So what's really bad about the movie is a slapdash editing and really crappy sound job and lousy music score that lifts a "cut to commercial" music signature bit from Charlie's Angels.

Also the principal cast is pretty bad and much post production re-dubbing of voices sounds like it was done by one actor impersonating the the cast rather poorly. And if those are the actors voices, almost impossible, but if those are then the post production sound is even worse than I'm giving it "credit" for.

The occasional crappy sets and pretty bad make-up further drag this down into the dumps. Some okay ideas from director Golden but usually defeated by one problem or another. But in the shameful hall of Lionsgate "pick up" movies this is for the most part not a total rip off, if you can overlook the sloppy editing. Sometimes shots linger just long enough to make you chuckle at a odd performance or a not so great effect, that would have been fine if it didn't linger.

Sure it's shot on video, like everything will be soon, quality varies but there is far worse looking stuff out there, but the sound really really tries to bury this one in the ground, lousy demon voices and that music score, it's like, well how can I say, bad.

One of the most pathetic and deceitful things a movie producer can do is promote his/her crap film by exploiting the name of a famous and extremely popular veteran actor and then subsequently only cast the popular veteran actor in a role that isn't much larger than a cameo appearance. Jeffrey Combs is incredibly popular among horror fans – mainly for his role of the demented Dr. West in the "Re-Animator" films – and he's one of the most regular & prominent actors active in the genre, so linking his name to a new film is guaranteed to attract more viewers. Combs' name is the first on the DVD-cover and the first one to be displayed during the opening credits, yet all together he only appears on screen for approximately three minutes of playtime in total! That's quite frustrating, especially because many people (myself included) probably feared already that "Satanic" would suck tremendously and hoped that Combs' performance would be the only worthwhile element. I just hope this isn't saying anything about Jeffrey Combs' career being in trouble or something. It's easy money, of course, but let's hope his career does not depend on paychecks like this. "Satanic" certainly isn't the worst horror film I ever saw, but it's dreadfully boring and the acting performances are incompetent beyond imagination. The basic concept of the film is somewhat intriguing, and admittedly I was pleasantly surprised by the end-twist, but the low-budget elaboration is very poor and amateurish. Following a disastrous car-accident, Michelle wakes up in a hospital and can't remember a single thing about her past and family situation. She carries around an eerie kind of Ouija-board soon suffers from nightmares in which her dead father comes to ask her bizarre questions regarding events that took place before the accident. Michelle is then moved from the hospital to a home for troubled teenagers where her tainted pas slowly gets unraveled. "Satanic" severely drags in places and none of the characters actually manages to say their lines properly. Especially James Russo and Diane Goldner are both horrible as the obnoxious owners of the Harmony House; the place where Michelle is sent after her treatment at the hospital. There's very little gore and bloodshed on display and most of the murders are incomprehensibly committed off screen. There's some hot female nudity and – as said – the denouement is admirable, but overall "Satanic" nearly isn't good or memorable enough to get a recommendation.

Utterly incoherent storyline, character development that does absolutely nothing, and awful acting. There is absolutely no reason to see this movie unless you're into sadism and masochism.

It starts off with a kid and her father in a car wreck, followed by horrible CGI, terribly fake stage setting, and giving the appearance that the movie might actually be interesting. Next scene, she's in the hospital, after having a miraculous recovery and facial rebuilding.

She ends up in some kind of foster home for troubled kids, and it doesn't really do anything from there. At all. Nothing. The first 3/4 of the movie is "character development" that does nothing, and the last 1/4 is exposition galore that also, surprisingly, does nothing.

Stale, emotionless acting, one of the most predictable and cliché endings to anything I've seen in awhile, and an incredibly weak - almost non-existent - plot kill this movie. There are absolutely no redeeming qualities to this movie aside from the random nude shots, and even those are boring.

2/10

I usually start my reviews with a brief synopsis but I really can't be bothered with this one. Since I was a kid I've had an interest in the occult, especially the darker side, so when I saw this DVD going cheap it instantly grabbed my attention. But instead of getting Black Masses we just get some goth chick with an evil looking Ouija board and one of the worst demons I've ever had the misfortune to see, some bad actor in a crappy rubber suit and dubbed with one of those awful "demonic" voices! The plot is rubbish, as is most of the acting. The ONLY 2 reasons why I have generously scored this 3 out of 10 instead of 2 is: firstly, the presence of horror legends Angus Scrimm and Jeffrey Combs (really just a cameo, pointless one at that); secondly, there is some brief but welcome nudity, in particular a short but very nice shower scene (I'm sure a body double was employed). Looking at the other reviews, one stands out - 9/10 by Horror Geek, who coincidently reviewed this when the movie came out & is his/hers only imdb review! Avoid!

After a car crash, the teenager Michelle (Annie Sorell) has the face completely destroyed and amnesia. In the hospital, she is called Bride of Mummy due to the mask she needs to wear along her therapy. However, her doctor makes a perfect facial reconstruction using family pictures and Michelle is discharged from the hospital and sent to a home that lodges young offenders since she was considered a troublemaker before the car crash. The police release her possessions of the day of the accident – a journal and an Ouija board - and Michelle moves with the host Bisson (Rick Dean) to his house. On the same day she leaves the hospital, the janitor is murdered. Michelle shares a room with the outcast delinquent Dalia (Eliza Swenson) and she has dreadful nightmares during the night and is confused. She befriends Larry (Brett Erickson), who shares another room in the house with Dutch (Brian Burnett), and tries to help her. When Dalia is found dead in the room with cuts in the wrists, the evidences are of suicide; however Detective Joyner (Jeffrey Combs) suspects that Michelle is the responsible for the murders.

The greatest attraction of "Satanic" is certainly the name of the cult- actor Jeffrey Combs in the credits, but unfortunately he has a minor role. The screenplay is a complete mess, with a poor development of the characters; and the worse, this lack of information of the characters is part of the predictable plot point. The unknown Annie Sorell is completely miscast in the role of a teenager since she is certainly twenty and something years old. The same happens to Eliza Swenson. The conclusion is terrible, with many deaths without any consequence. My vote is three.

Title (Brazil): "Jogos Satânicos" ("Satanic Games")