Geoffrey Owens: Elvin Tibideaux

Cliff in Love

Elvin Tibideaux

[while Elvin waits for Sondra, Clair offers coffee for him and Cliff; Elvin is surprised]
Elvin Tibideaux: I'm sorry, Mrs. Huxtable, I didn't think you did that kind of thing.
Clair Huxtable: What kind of thing?
Elvin Tibideaux: You know... serve.
Clair Huxtable: Serve whom?
Elvin Tibideaux: [indicating Cliff] Serve him.
Clair Huxtable: [with a tense smile] Oh, serve *him*. As in "serve your man"?
Elvin Tibideaux: Well, yeah.
Clair Huxtable: [now visibly indignant] Let me tell you something, Elvin. You see, I am not "serving" Dr. Huxtable, okay?
Elvin Tibideaux: Okay.
Clair Huxtable: That's the kind of thing that goes on in a restaurant. Now I am going to bring him a cup of coffee just like he brought me a cup of coffee this morning. And *that*, young man, is what marriage is made of: it is give-and-take fifty-fifty. And if you don't get it together, and drop these macho attitudes, you are never gonna have anybody bringing you anything anywhere any place any time EVER.
[pauses, then smiles graciously]
Clair Huxtable: Now, what would you like in your coffee?
Elvin Tibideaux: [shaken] Maybe I can get *you* some coffee.
Clair Huxtable: Elvin, that's alright. I don't mind getting it. But thanks for offering.
[Clair takes the tray to the kitchen; Elvin slowly sits down and looks at Cliff, scared]
Cliff: Elvin?
Elvin Tibideaux: Yes, sir?
Cliff: When she brings the coffee back, if I were you, I wouldn't drink it.

Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: Elvin.
Elvin Tibideaux: Yes?
Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: [chuckles] Elvin...
Elvin Tibideaux: Yes?
Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: You're making my house a wreck.
Elvin Tibideaux: I know, sir.
Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: I'm not too sure if you do, son. A brother cannot drink a glass of milk in this house.

Elvin Tibideaux: I've been very inconsiderate with Sondra, I admit.
Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: Yes.
Elvin Tibideaux: That's why I came over.
Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: Mm-hmm.
Elvin Tibideaux: I want to apologize to her.
Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: Again.
Elvin Tibideaux: Again. And... And to tell her that things are going to be different.
Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: Again.
Elvin Tibideaux: Yeah, again.
[Clair comes downstairs]
Clair Huxtable: Elvin.
Elvin Tibideaux: Hello, Mrs. Huxtable.
Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: Hi.
Clair Huxtable: [notices Elvin's flowers] Oh.
Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: Elvin brought flowers for Sondra, dear.
Clair Huxtable: Again.
Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: Again.

Elvin Tibideaux: Dr. Huxtable?
Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: Yes, son?
Elvin Tibideaux: Your wife goes to work and you cook?
Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: Right.
Elvin Tibideaux: Well, doesn't it ever bother you that when you come home at night, there's not always a hot meal waiting for you?
Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: Oh, no. Sometimes my wife comes home and there's no hot meal waiting for her. Wh-What's your point?
Elvin Tibideaux: Well, I-I just feel it confuses things when a woman works. My mother works, and I don't like it. You know, sometimes when I come home, there's nothing to eat.
Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: [chuckles] Well, heh, are your... are your hands broken?