Bill Cosby credited as playing...
Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable
- Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: I put the thing in reverse, I let go of the emergency brake and push down on the gas and the car said...
- [pauses, looking like he's confused]
- Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: 'Oh, you want to go backwards!'. So now we back out, and the thing takes off and
- [makes a hiccup noise and stiffens]
- Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: and now it's vibrating. I mean, this motor makes a
- [makes a motorboat sound]
- Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: Now, I look in the rear view mirror and whatever I'm gonna run over, there's twelve of them.
- Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: [telling Claire, who's laughing, about the test drive with the car Denise wants to buy] I press down on the gas and, you think I'm lying, the car said 'what?'.
- Denise Huxtable: Daddy, a few minor adjustments.
- Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: A few minor adjustments? How much money do you think it will cost to fix this car up?
- Denise Huxtable: I dunno, $200.
- Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: $200, huh? Let me tell you something. First of all, you got a major steering problem.
- Denise Huxtable: Oh, so you get a new steering wheel.
- Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: The wheel was the best thing on the car!
- [Cliff is meeting with a older couple, Mr. and Mrs. Kenton. Mr. Kenton appears to be in his 50's, Mrs. Kenton in late 40's]
- Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: I wanted to meet with you about the results of your test.
- Mr. Kenton: Everything's all right, isn't it, Doctor?
- Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: Everything's fine...
- [turns to Mrs. Kenton]
- Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: you're pregnant!
- Mr. Kenton: [perplexed] How did it happen?
- Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: Well, you see, there were these two bees...
- Mr. Kenton: I do know how it
- [the pregnancy]
- Mr. Kenton: happened, I just didn't know I could make it happen!
- Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: The human male is quite capable well into his seventies and, for some, beyond.
- Mrs. Kenton: [stunned, looking at her husband] We're going to have a baby...
- [both turn to look at Cliff]
- Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: Well, I didn't do it!
- Mr. Kenton: Donnie is going to have a baby brother or sister!
- Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: Donnie is your son?
- Mr. Kenton: He's 26! He has a son five!
- Mrs. Kenton: Our child is going to be younger than our grandchild!
- Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: [trying to be reassuring] Yes, the child will be... younger than the grandchild, but... it's OK, because... the two of you... will be older than... everybody!
- Sam Lucas: Looks like your daughter's fond of the car.
- Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: Yeah.
- Sam Lucas: What do you think it's worth?
- Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: Well, it's hard to say. What do you want for it?
- Sam Lucas: Well I just want a fair price.
- Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: I want to give you a fair price.
- Sam Lucas: Then we should have no problem.
- Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: Okay, so what's your fair price?
- Sam Lucas: I don't know. What do you think is a fair price?+
- Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: [negotiating the price of a used car] Well I think my daughter would be happy paying $500 for it.
- Sam Lucas: I just hung up on you.
- Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: Well... you want me to dial again?
- Sam Lucas: I hope I'm home.
- Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: 750.
- Sam Lucas: I hear it ringing.
- Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: 850.
- Sam Lucas: Hello!