Nicky Henson credited as playing...
Mr. Johnson
- Sybil Fawlty: Good evening, Mr. Johnson!
- Mr. Johnson: Evening! Any messages?
- Polly: Um, three, I think.
- Sybil Fawlty: Three! Everybody wants you, don't they?
- Mr. Johnson: [chuckles] I wouldn't say that.
- Sybil Fawlty: Ah, well, you're only single once.
- Basil Fawlty: [calling from office] Twice can be arranged.
- Basil Fawlty: Are you dining here tonight, here in this unfashionable dump?
- Mr. Johnson: I wasn't planning to.
- Basil Fawlty: No, not really your scene, is it?
- Mr. Johnson: I thought I'd try somewhere in town. Anywhere you recommend?
- Basil Fawlty: Well, what sort of food were you thinking of... fruit or...?
- Mr. Johnson: Anywhere they do French food?
- Basil Fawlty: Yes, France, I believe. They seem to like it there, and the swim would certainly sharpen your appetite. You'd better hurry, the tide leaves in six minutes.
- Mrs. Abbott: Do you have a... a guide to Torquay?
- Basil Fawlty: A guide... Um, oh dear. I think we're out of them again.
- Mr. Johnson: Do you want to look at this one? I got it in town.
- Mrs. Abbott: Oh, thanks. Yes. "What's on in Torquay."
- Mr. Johnson: Yes. One of the world's shortest books.
- Basil Fawlty: What?
- Mr. Johnson: One of the world's shortest books. Like "The Wit of Margaret Thatcher", or "Great English Lovers".
- Sybil Fawlty: [laughing] He's very funny, isn't he, Basil?