Nathan Fillion credited as playing...
Captain Malcolm 'Mal' Reynolds
- [after River gets a hold of one of Jayne's guns]
- Jayne: Let's move this conversation in a not-Jayne's-fault direction. I didn't make her crazy. Hell, I didn't even want 'er on the ship.
- Mal: Is that the direction you want this conversation to go in?
- Jayne: Just don't wanna take a lashin' for something I ain't the cause of.
- Zoë: Where's River at now?
- Mal: In her room, which I'm thinking we bolt from the outside from now on.
- Wash: That's a little extreme, isn't it?
- Jayne: Anybody remember her coming at me with a butcher's knife?
- Wash: Wacky fun.
- Jayne: You wanna go, little man?
- Wash: Only if it's someplace with candlelight.
- Zoë: Sir, I know she's unpredictable, but I don't think she'd harm anyone.
- Jayne: Butcher's knife!
- Zoë: Anyone we can't spare.
- River: [having taken a gun away from River, Mal looks at Simon] This here is a recipe for unpleasantness. Does she understand that?
- River: [before Simon can speak] She understands. She doesn't comprehend.
- Mal: [looking at River] Well, I'm glad we've made that distinction. No touching guns, okay?
- River: No touching.
- [nods, then runs away]
- Inara Serra: [about Jubal Early] Any chance that shiong-mung duh kwong-run might survive?
- [xiong meng de kung ren: violent lunatic]
- Mal: Air he had left, I'd say his chance'd be about one in... a very large number.
- Mal: You know, the only thing you're gonna find in New Melbourne is fish and fish related activities so unless you got the overwhelming urge to gut sturgeon... and who hasn't occasionally...
- [Mal has just taken one of Jayne's guns from River]
- Mal: Fully loaded, safety off. This here is a recipe for unpleasantness.
- Jubal Early: You made the right move, darling. Best for you to go home with old Early.
- Mal: You think so? Some of us feel differently.