Kelsey Grammer credited as playing...
Dr. Frasier Crane
- Dr. Frasier Crane: After one night out with you in a bar, the man is ready to throw away three weeks of intense analysis.
- Martin Crane: Well, Fras, the guy's finally having a little fun. Don't you want him to be happy?
- Dr. Frasier Crane: I am not trying to make him happy! I am trying to cure his depression.
- Kenny Daly: Hey Marty, does this remind you of anything?
- [Kenny downs his cup of coffee like a shot of liquor]
- Kenny Daly: Ow, hot!
- Dr. Frasier Crane: Dad, the inability to maintain adult relationships often has its roots in parent-child trauma.
- Martin Crane: What's your generation gonna do when we're all gone and there's no one left to blame?
- Dr. Frasier Crane: Kenny, divorce can be one of life's most difficult transitions. Have you considered seeing a professional once or twice a week?
- Kenny Daly: I've thought about it, but prostitutes are expensive.
- Dr. Niles Crane: You're seeing patients again?
- Dr. Frasier Crane: Well, just this one for the last three weeks. Very challenging case, too. The man has father issues, any number of neuroses, and a phobia or two.
- Dr. Niles Crane: Sounds to me like you've hit the crackpot.
- Martin Crane: Kenny, I've been thinking about what you've been going through, and I've come up with the answer. A suede jacket.
- Dr. Frasier Crane: Did you hear that? A suede jacket? I must have missed that lecture at Harvard Medical School.
- Martin Crane: You'll look good in it and women love to feel it. It's like you're a feast for the senses.
- Dr. Frasier Crane: Well, it's Dad. He's been taking Kenny to McGinty's every night and he's giving him therapy in the form of beer and fun.
- Dr. Niles Crane: Poor Kenny.
- Dr. Frasier Crane: Well, I think we have time for one last caller. Go ahead, Mindy. I'm listening.
- Mindy: [speaking softly] It's about my mother, Dr. Crane. Ever since I got married, she's been...
- Mindy: Yes, the cashmere turtleneck is $39.
- Dr. Frasier Crane: Excuse me, what?
- Mindy: [speaking softly again] Sorry, I work in catalog sales and my boss just walked past. So anyway, my mom...
- Mindy: Yes, it's on sale until the end of the month.
- Dr. Frasier Crane: Mindy, we are pressed for time.
- Roz Doyle: Hold on, Frasier. Cashmere for under 40 bucks? I'll take one in black. In medium. Wait, is that medium-medium or unrealistic-anorexic-model-medium?
- Mindy: It sounds like you might want to go with the large.
- Roz Doyle: Oh really.
- Dr. Frasier Crane: And that's our show. What size will Roz order? Will she accessorize? Tune in tomorrow for the exciting conclusion.