John Mahoney credited as playing...
Martin Crane
- Martin: [giving Niles food advice] Now the buffets come at a pretty good pace, so you gotta pace yourself. And watch out for your fillers - your breads, your rolls, your chips, your dips. You've only got so much room - don't be a hero.
- Dr. Frasier Crane: I know exactly what you're going to say. You're going to say I should mind my own business and keep my big bazoo shut.
- Martin: I was gonna say "fat yap", but you're in the ballpark.
- Daphne Moon: [coming out from her bedroom dressed in a robe] Hello, Dr. Crane.
- Dr. Frasier Crane: Oh, hello, Daphne. Looking very... comfortable for afternoon.
- Daphne Moon: I just love days like this... nowhere to go, nothing to do... though I have this sneaking suspicion I've forgotten something.
- Dr. Frasier Crane: Like getting dressed?
- Daphne Moon: [looking out the window] Oh, I could watch the rain for hours. Of course, when I was a little girl, I hated the rain. Stuck inside, couldn't go out and play. But my mum always said, "enjoy it while you can, there'll be no water in hell." Of course, that was her answer for everything. "Eat your veggies, there'll be no Brussels sprouts in hell... have a lie-down, there'll be no naps in hell..."
- Dr. Frasier Crane: Daphne, you know I am a therapist, if you'd like to talk about this sometime.
- Daphne Moon: About what?
- Dr. Frasier Crane: Nothing.
- Daphne Moon: I wish I could remember what it is I forgot to do. Oh well, you know what they say - if you can't remember, it probably wasn't important anyway.
- [at that moment, a furious Martin comes in, soaking wet from the rain]
- Dr. Frasier Crane: Dad!
- Daphne Moon: [realizing] Oh no!
- Dr. Frasier Crane: [getting up from the piano stool] You are dripping!
- Martin: Yeah, that's what'll happen when you're standing out on the corner waiting for your ride!
- Daphne Moon: Mr. Crane, I am so sorry!
- Daphne Moon: What the hell were you thinking?
- Dr. Frasier Crane: Venting these emotions is all well and good, Dad, but I just had these floors waxed!
- [Frasier takes Martin's coat and hands him a towel, rushes to lay down a newspaper]
- Martin: [to Daphne] I said four o'clock on the corner of Second and Bell.
- Daphne Moon: Well, you should have called me!
- Martin: Well, I was afraid if I went looking for a phone I'd miss you!