Matthew Perry credited as playing...
Chandler Bing
- Monica Geller: I can't wait to see you. I'm just going to tell Rachel that I'm doing laundry for a couple hours.
- Chandler: Laundry. Huh. Is that my new nickname?
- [Rachel is shocked]
- Monica Geller: You know what your nickname is, Mr Big...
- Rachel: AHHHHH!
- [hangs up]
- [last lines]
- Chandler: I can't take it any more! So you win, okay? Pheebs? Flying a jet? Better make it a spaceship so that you can get back to your home planet! And Ross, phone call for you today - Tom Jones, he wants his pants back! And Hornswoggle? What? Are you dating a character from "Fraggle Rock"? Ahh.
- Joey: What's the matter?
- Chandler: We wanted to kiss at midnight but nobody else is going to, so, you know...
- Joey: Alright... I'll take care of it.
- Monica Geller: Joey! It's thirty seconds to midnight, what are you gonna do?
- Joey: Will you just trust me?
- [Heads to Ross]
- Ross: 33, 32, 31...
- Joey: Ross, Ross, listen, who are you kissing at midnight, huh? Rachel or Phoebe?
- Ross: What?
- Joey: Well, you gotta kiss someone, can't kiss your sister.
- Ross: Well, who's gonna kiss my sister?
- Joey: Chandler.
- Ross: Oh, man, really?
- Joey: Dude, who would you rather to have kiss your sister, me or Chandler?
- Ross: That's good point. Well, since I have that whole history with Rachel, I guess Phoebe.
- Joey: Ok, great
- [Goes over to Phoebe]
- Joey: Pheebs, Pheebs, listen. Ross wants to kiss you at midnight.
- Phoebe: It's so obvious, why doesn't he just ask.
- Joey: [Going over to Rachel] Rache, Rache. Listen, I'm going to kiss you at midnight.
- Rachel: What?
- Joey: Everybody's gotta kiss someone, can't kiss Ross, you got the history.
- Rachel: So?
- Joey: So, who'd you Rather kissing you, me or Chandler?
- Rachel: Oh, good point.
- [Countdown is over and they all kiss]
- Chandler: [frustrated from being unable to make fun of Ross] Phoebs, you may know this, you know strange things. What is the boiling point of brain?