Matt LeBlanc credited as playing...
Joey Tribbiani
- Monica Geller: Hey, Joey! What would you do if you were omnipotent?
- Joey Tribbiani: Probably kill myself.
- Monica Geller: Excuse me?
- Joey Tribbiani: Hey, if Little Joey's dead, I got no reason to live.
- Dr. Ross Geller: Uhm, Joey... OMNI-potent.
- Joey Tribbiani: You are? I'm so sorry.
- Joey Tribbiani: [entering Central Perk, followed by Chandler] 95, 96, 97. See? I told you - less than a hundred steps from our place to here.
- Chandler: You got *way* too much free time.
- Dr. Ross Geller: Oh, my God... oh... Is today the twentieth, October twentieth?
- Monica Geller: I was hoping you won't remember.
- Dr. Ross Geller: [sadly moaning:] Ohh...
- Joey Tribbiani: What's wrong with the twentieth?
- Chandler: Eleven days before Halloween, all the good costumes are gone?
- Dr. Ross Geller: Today's the day Carol and I first consummated... our physical relationship...
- [looks over at puzzled Joey]
- Dr. Ross Geller: Sex.
- [Joey nods]
- Dr. Ross Geller: You know what? I think I'm just gonna pass on the game, go home, and think about my ex-wife and her lesbian lover.
- Joey Tribbiani: [rises] To hell with hockey, let's all do that!
- Rachel: [joyously waving envelope about] Look, look, look, look, my first paycheck! Look, there's a window, and there's my name! Hi, me!
- Phoebe: I remember the day that I got my first paycheck. There was a cave-in in one of the mines, and eight people were killed.
- Monica Geller: What? You worked in a mine?
- Phoebe: I worked in a Dairy Queen. Why?
- Rachel: [opening her envelope] Now isn't this exciting? I *earned* this! I wiped tables for it, and it's totally...
- [sees the amount on the check]
- Rachel: not worth it. What's FICA? Why are they getting all my money? Chandler, look at that!
- Chandler: Oh, this is not that bad.
- Joey Tribbiani: You're fine, yeah, for a first job...
- Dr. Ross Geller: You can totally, totally live on this.
- Phoebe: Oh, yeah. Yeah!
- Dr. Ross Geller: Hey, by the way, *great* service!
- [everybody agrees and chips in with a tip for their poor destitute friend]