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Lisa Kudrow and David Schwimmer in Friends (1994)

Jennifer Aniston: Rachel Green

The One with Phoebe's Cookies

Friends

Jennifer Aniston credited as playing...

Rachel Green

Photos1

View Poster

Quotes5

  • Rachel: Oh, my god - I've become my father. I've been trying so hard not to become my mother, I didn't see this coming.
  • Joey: You're mean on the boat.
  • Rachel: What? I was just trying to teach you.
  • Joey: Well, lesson learned. Rachel is mean.
  • Ross: Yeeeeeep... Yep-yep-yep-yep-yep. I remember when she took me out on her dad's boat, she wouldn't let me help at all.
  • Rachel: Excuse me - I wanted you to help, but you couldn't move your arms because you were wearing three life jackets.
  • Ross: You have to respect the sea.
  • Rachel: Look, Joey, I'm sorry if - if you thought that was mean, but I gotta tell ya something. That was not mean. OK, my father is mean; he used to yell at me all the time on the boat - I mean, it was horrible. I was just being a good teacher.
  • Joey: Does a good teacher say, "Put down the beer, pinhead?"
  • Rachel: Well, does a good student drink seven beers during his first lesson?
  • Joey: Six and a half! You knocked that last one out of my hand! Remember?
  • Rachel: Yeah, I didn't want you to get hit by the boom!
  • Joey: Well, it hit me anyway! And it would've hurt a lot less if I had finished that last beer.
  • Rachel: Alright, y'know what? I - I'm sorry. I will try to tone it down and, uh, stop yelling.
  • Joey: You won't boss me around anymore?
  • Rachel: I won't boss you around.
  • Joey: And you'll be nice?
  • Rachel: And I'll be nice.
  • Joey: And you'll be topless?
  • Rachel: And I'll - Joey!
  • Joey: Do you want me to learn?
  • Rachel: OK, Joey, we're luffing a little bit, so could you tighten up the cunningham?
  • Joey: Uh, wow - you just said a bunch of stuff I didn't know there.
  • Rachel: Joey, come on! We just went over this!
  • Joey: Oh, y'know, when we did, that was when that bird was flying overhead with the fish in his mouth. Did you see it? It was gross!
  • Rachel: [furious] No! Alright? I did *not* see the bird! I did *not* see the fish! I did *not* see the piece of Styrofoam that was shaped like Mike Tyson! I did *not*, because I was trying to teach you *how* to sail a boat! Which obviously is an impossible thing to do!
  • Joey: Alright, that's it! You're yelling, and I don't see you taking your top off! I quit!
  • Rachel: What do you mean you quit? You can't quit!
  • Joey: Why not?
  • Rachel: Because you're not finished yet, and I won't have it! Greens do not quit!
  • Joey: Greens? I'm a Tribbiani! And Tribbianis quit!
  • Rachel: You know, Joey, I could teach you to sail, if you want.
  • Joey: You could?
  • Rachel: Yeah! I've been sailing my whole life. When I was fifteen, my dad bought me my own boat.
  • Phoebe: Your own boat?
  • Rachel: What? What? He was trying to cheer me up! My pony was sick.

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