Lisa Kudrow credited as playing...
Phoebe Buffay
- Monica: I saw you eat a cheeseburger!
- [Everyone gasps]
- Monica: Well, didn't you?
- Phoebe: I might have.
- Monica: I can't believe you didn't tell me.
- Phoebe: C'mon. Like you tell me everything?
- Monica: What haven't I told you?
- Phoebe: Oh I don't know. How about the fact that the underwear out on the telephone pole is yours from when you were having sex with Fun Bobby on the terrace!
- [Everyone runs to the window to look]
- Monica: Who told you that?
- [Looks at Chandler]
- Monica: You are dead meat.
- Chandler: I didn't know if was a big secret.
- Monica: Oh, it's not big. Not at all. You know, kind of the same as, I don't know, a third nipple!
- Phoebe: [Gasps] You have a third nipple?
- Chandler: [to Monica] You bitch!
- Ross: Whip it out! Whip it out!
- Chandler: No. C'mon! There's nothing to see. It's a tiny bump. It's totally useless.
- Rachel: As opposed to your other multi-functional nipples?
- Joey: I can't believe you! You told me it was a nubbin!
- Ross: Joey, what did you think a nubbin was?
- Joey: I don't know. You see something, you hear a word. I thought that was it. Let me see it again!
- Ross: Yes! Show us your nubbin!
- Chandler: [Doesn't know what to say while everyone comes at him] Joey was in a porno movie!
- [Everyone gasps. Joey is shocked Chandler would say that]
- Chandler: If I'm going down, I'm taking everybody with me.
- Phoebe: I don't understand. How can you be straight? I mean, you're so smart and funny, and you throw such great Academy Award parties.
- Duncan: I know. That's what I kept telling myself. But you just reach a point where you can't live a lie anymore.
- Phoebe: So how long have you known?
- Duncan: I guess on some level I always knew I was straight. I thought I was supposed to be something else. You know, I'm an ice dancer, all my friends are gay. I was just trying to fit in.
- Phoebe: And, um... And there's actually a woman?
- Duncan: Her name's Debra.
- Phoebe: Oh. Well, is she the first that you've been with?
- Duncan: Well, I've never told you this but there were one or two times back in college when I'd get really drunk and go to a straight bar and wake up with a woman next to me. But I told myself it was the liquor, and everyone experiments in college... But now I know I don't have a choice about this. I was born this way.