Betty White credited as playing...
Rose Nylund
- [the girls' friend and neighbour Renee is worried that her doctor husband spends too long at work and doesn't have much time for her]
- Blanche Devereaux: Talk to your husband.
- Renee Corliss: Blanche, at the hospital they call him St. George! I'm married to a saint and I'm gonna tell him to work less, I'm lonely?
- Sophia Petrillo: Don't you think St. Francis of Assisi's wife had a similar problem? Don't you think she said, "Frank, enough donkeys"?
- Renee Corliss: So what do I do? Ask George to cut back on his practice because I don't want to eat alone?
- Rose Nylund: Oh no, don't do that. I couldn't possibly go to another doctor.
- Renee Corliss: See?
- Rose Nylund: George is the only man to ever see me naked.
- Blanche Devereaux: Get outta here.
- Rose Nylund: Well, except for Charlie, of course.
- Blanche Devereaux: Get outta here.
- Rose Nylund: And the vet.
- Dorothy Petrillo-Zbornak: The vet?
- Rose Nylund: Our prize hen Henrietta had some kind of a chicken disease. I don't exactly know what it was.
- Dorothy Petrillo-Zbornak: Chickenpox.
- Rose Nylund: No, I don't think so. Anyway, I had an earache, so he saw us both at the same time.
- Dorothy Petrillo-Zbornak: For that you got naked?
- Rose Nylund: I thought that was strange, too.
- Renee Corliss: Dorothy, it's crazy, but I feel like, how can I bother him? He's doing all this important stuff. Saving lives. And I'm gonna bother him because I'm a little unhappy?
- Dorothy Petrillo-Zbornak: Renee, Jenny just left for college. All your kids are gone. This is a perfectly legitimate problem.
- Rose Nylund: It's the "Empty Nest" syndrome. When I had it, I didn't know what it was. I was just very depressed. By the time I figured out what it was, I was gonna tell Charlie, but he died that night.
- Renee Corliss: At two in the morning, waiting for George to come home, I called a radio talk show. I gave them the solution to the crisis in the Middle East.
- Rose Nylund: [excited] Giving the Palestinians Greenland?
- Renee Corliss: [delighted] You heard it?
- Rose Nylund: I didn't know that was you! You were great!
- Dorothy Petrillo-Zbornak: [after a pause to let it sink in] Giving the Palestinians Greenland?
- Renee Corliss: It's a big place. Nobody uses it.
- Dorothy Petrillo-Zbornak: You would take a desert people and put them in the ice and snow?
- Rose Nylund: With the proper clothes, they'll be fine.