Andreanne Benidir: Stephanie Alpert

The Headless Ghost

Stephanie Alpert

Duane Comack: It's getting late, maybe we should be heading back.
Seth: I'm sorry, can't let you leave.
Stephanie Alpert: What are you talking about?
Duane Comack: Why-why did you lock the door, Seth?
Seth: I lied to you. My name isn't Seth. It's Andrew. It's been Andrew for over a hundred years.
Stephanie Alpert: But you can't be Andrew. Andrew lost his head.
Seth: This isn't my head. I borrowed it. But I have to return it. And so, I'll need a new head. And guess what, Duane? I'm gonna take yours. I need your head, Duane.
[he moves towards Duane]
Duane Comack: I need it too.
Seth: It won't hurt. Well, maybe just a little. For only a second. A quick twist. It'll come right off. Snap!
[Seth snaps his fingers]
Seth: Just like chicken leg.
Duane Comack: You're just joking, right?
Seth: Oh, it's no joke, Duane. I'm gonna pull your head off.
Duane Comack: Wait. M-M-Maybe we could help you. You know? Find your old head?
Seth: Oh, it's no use. For years and years I searched every room, every hallway, every closet.
Duane Comack: Why my head?
Seth: Well, I would take her's, but it'll look kind of funny.
Duane Comack: My head's not that great either. I mean, it gets allergies, it's-it's not that good at math and it's - it's hair never does what you want it to.
Seth: Nice try, Duane. But it's no use. I'm gonna take your head. That's all there is to it. Just hold still.

Duane Comack: Let's get out of here.
Stephanie Alpert: Not until we find the head.
[looks for the head]
Stephanie Alpert: Is it here?
[continues looking]
Stephanie Alpert: Nah. How about here? Nope. Oh no. Oh no.
Duane Comack: What?
Stephanie Alpert: The- The head.
Duane Comack: Where?
Stephanie Alpert: Nowhere you sucker! Are you gonna fall for every dumb trick tonight?

Otto: [after kicking Duane and Stephanie out of the house] You are no longer welcome at Hill House. And if you should ever come back... I shall not be responsible for what the spirits may do. You have no respect!
Stephanie Alpert: [picks up snow and tosses it at the door] Respect this, you old grouch!
Duane Comack: Don't!
[Stephanie throws the snow at the door, the animal on the door handle growls]
Duane Comack: What did you do that for?
Stephanie Alpert: You know, Duane, you're getting to be a real drag.
Duane Comack: I'm a drag? You know, you never know when to stop, do you, Stephanie?

Duane Comack: What's this?
Andrew's Mother: It's called a dumbwaiter. Goes all the way up the attic. It was used to bring food up from the kitchen. You see... a long time ago, there was a boy who lived in this room.
Stephanie Alpert: Andrew? The boy who lost his head?
Andrew's Mother: No. A different boy. A very spoiled boy who loved to eat ice cream. Strawberry ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. He always wanted ice cream. And he kept the kitchen maid hopping with his demands. Ice cream. He just couldn't get enough Ice cream. Well, one day, the dumbwaiter didn't come all the way up. The boy reached... and he reached... until finally... he reached too far. When the maid found him at the bottom of the shaft... it was hard to tell the difference between... the boys face... and the strawberry ice cream.
Stephanie Alpert: Gross.
Andrew's Mother: Some say that the boy fell. Others say that he was pushed... by a ghost.
Duane Comack: That's just a story. You said you were gonna show us real ghosts.