Alfred Hitchcock credited as playing...
Self - Host
- [introduction - Hitchcock is shown wearing a beret and with a false goatee]
- Self - Host: Good evening, fellow members of the beat generation. Thank you for allowing me in your pad. Some of you cats are no doubt wondering how I got with it. Well, man, getting in this generation isn't hard. No, daddy-o, you just lie about your age. But I didn't join just for kicks or just to dig the crazy types. No, man. I joined because I wanted to be as avant as I could get. And this is it. I'm a jump man and I love to ball along with a wheel in the hand and a four on the road. I love to dig the cool notes of a tenor man blowing his top in a wild dive in San Fran. For it's then that I know the essence of life. But you must think me the talkinest cat that ever flipped. It's time to cut out. Disassociate me from the bourgeois trivia which follows. I'll dig you later.
- [afterword]
- Self - Host: What can I say, man? A typical tale of middle class types caught in the rat race of modern society. And a happy ending is a final sell-out to commercialism. But that reminds me. You wanted to know why I'm hung up. I shall now show you what bugged me. I'll dig you at its conclusion. Please reciprocate.
- [commercial]
- Self - Host: Man, I've changed my mind. That was the greatest. The story may be unhip, but those crazy commercials are pure poetry. They deserve better treatment. Next time, I shall read them to a jazz accompaniment. Man, this could be a new art form. Pure, but frantic. And now it's time for me to split the joint. I'll dig you in one week. I hope you can make the scene.