Alfred Hitchcock credited as playing...
Self - Host
- [afterword]
- Self - Host: And that concludes tonight's play, "The Big Score". However, while Ozzie and his friends appear to be a hit on point in our final quarter, it was the police who finally won the game. Mike, Arnie, Ozzie and Murphy have all been benched for 20 to 30 years. In case you've been puzzled by this athletic theme, I should explain. This portion of the program was originally prepared for a story about college football. Of course, we soon discovered that football is hardly a suitable subject for television. There's far too much violence. Then there's the matter of athletic scholarships and quite a bit of bribery and, all in all, we felt the story put American youth in much too bad a light. For this reason only, we substituted tonight's tale of juvenile delinquency. And now for that part of the program, for which I wish there were a substitute, after which I shall return.
- [commercial]
- Self - Host: How do you do? I'm Alfred Hitchcock. I thought you might have forgotten during my absence. This concludes tonight's training session. We shall return next week, when I shall lecture on the art of point-shaving and game throwing. Until then, good night.
- [introduction - Hitchcock is drawing on a chalkboard]
- Self - Host: Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to another skull session. I think we have at last conceived the perfect football play. If you have ten men to do your blocking and follow this plan, you should have no trouble reaching the refreshments stand at halftime. If you haven't ten men, you can do just as well using two elderly ladies armed with hat pins. Tonight's training film is called "The Big Score". But first, the head coach wishes to give you a one-minute pep talk.