Alfred Hitchcock credited as playing...
Self - Host
- [introduction]
- Alfred Hitchcock: [In his customary suit, Hitchcock is wearing a fisherman's hat and holding a fishing rod; he is standing outside a bathtub and fishing in it] Shh! I can't understand it. Of course. How stupid of me. I forgot to put in the water. I must do that at once if I want to catch anything today.
- [steps forward and turns on an imaginary tap; we hear the sound of water running]
- Alfred Hitchcock: All of this is not as absurdly irrelevant as you think. For if you listen very closely, you will hear the words "bath tub" mentioned in tonight's script. Of course, other topics are mentioned which we could have discussed. For example, the story is about marriage. However, I don't feel that marriage should be discussed on television. It's too controversial. No question about it. We are much safer with a bathtub.
- [points downward at it]
- Alfred Hitchcock: And now, in a moment, here is tonight's opéra bouffe, "The End of Indian Summer." Like all stories about marriage it has a great deal of romance in it.
- [gesticulates to the audience]
- Alfred Hitchcock: But watch for that bathtub.
- [afterword]
- Alfred Hitchcock: [Hitchcock has his fishing rod over his right shoulder] Theirs was truly a wedding of December and December. It ended in a draw, with no one the winner except the insurance companies. And now for the epilogue of tonight's story, after which I'll scamper back.
- [after commercial. Hitchcock now has his fishing rod over his left shoulder]
- Alfred Hitchcock: We have now passed another tombstone along television's highway to culture.
- [takes off his fishing hat and holds it over his heart]
- Alfred Hitchcock: Please join us next week when we continue our pilgrimage. Good night.
- [turns to his right]