Alfred Hitchcock credited as playing...
Self - Host
- [introduction - Hitchcock is laying on a psychiatrist's couch]
- Psychiatrist: You are very sleepy. You can't seem to hold your eyes open. You're beginning to drift. You're drifting. You're sound asleep. Can you hear me?
- Self - Host: Yes.
- Psychiatrist: Say "Good evening, ladies and gentlemen."
- Self - Host: Good evening, ladies and gentlemen.
- Psychiatrist: "Thank you for tuning in."
- Self - Host: Thank you for tuning in.
- Psychiatrist: You're now going back in time. Far back. Back years and years ago. You're drifting back through the years. Back. Back. Back. When you speak next, you will be forty years old.
- [Hitchcock gets up]
- Self - Host: Forty?
- Psychiatrist: I'm sorry. I mean four.
- Self - Host: That's better.
- [lounges]
- Self - Host: I have a little shadow that goes in and out with me. And what can be the use of him? Mommy, why do I cast such a large shadow? I never liked the way she answered that question.
- Psychiatrist: What games did you play?
- Self - Host: I didn't play much. I spent most of my time watching television.
- Psychiatrist: Television? When you were four?
- Self - Host: Yes. I was a very precocious child.
- Psychiatrist: What did you see on television?
- Self - Host: Stories. Mostly stories like this one.
- [afterword - Hitchcock has a baby bonnet halfway around his neck]
- Self - Host: What do you think of this? He regressed me and then only brought me halfway back. I -
- [notices something off-camera]
- Self - Host: Good heavens, everyone's asleep. That last commercial must have hypnotized them. It put the entire audience under.
- [snaps fingers]
- Self - Host: That didn't--That didn't do any good. Since you can't wake up, I can only leave you with this post-hypnotic suggestion. Next week when you awaken, you will feel compelled to tune in again when we promise to bring you another story and three less soporific commercials. Good night.