Alfred Hitchcock credited as playing...
Self - Host
- [afterword]
- Self - Host: As has been said before on television, a district attorney's lot is not a happy one. But on Ernie's next effort, the law caught up with Ernie and he paid the penalty for a sloppy makeup job. And now we must listen to a speech from a gentleman who consistently ignores the rule against electioneering within 50 yards of the polls, after which I shall return for a rebuttal.
- [commercial, after which Hitchcock peeks into the booth]
- Self - Host: I don't see the lever, much less the voting machine. Actually, these weren't made originally for voting booths. They were army surplus, having been...
- [peeks again]
- Self - Host: Ah, there it is.
- [goes into the booth, then a splash is heard and Hitchcock comes out wet]
- Self - Host: As I was saying, these were formerly portable showers. Next week, I shall return to campaign once more for clean government. Until then, good night.
- [introduction - Hitchcock is in front of a booth]
- Self - Host: Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. This is a voting booth. It comes complete with voting instructions. You will observe that it is a one-passenger model. When you enter, you go alone. There is not even room for your conscience. The inventor was afraid that would prove too large a handicap to speedy elections. These booths come in only one size, thus automatically disenfranchising certain of our population who do not conform to conventional physical standards. This has no direct bearing on tonight's story, but is merely offered as a public service. Actually, there is much that has no direct bearing on tonight's story. The following, for example.