Buddy Ebsen credited as playing...
Jed Clampett
- Shorty Kellems: Jed, you forgettin' we was boys together. We run in a pretty fast crowd and you was the fastest.
- Jed Clampett: Me?
- Shorty Kellems: You was the wildest girl-chasin'est rascal in the whole county.
- Jed Clampett: I was not!
- Shorty Kellems: Somebody in our crowd was.
- Jed Clampett: How about you?
- Shorty Kellems: That's who it was!
- Shorty Kellems: This is the money I got from the silver mine. Sold out to a Syndicate from Reed Springs. Fred Syndicate.
- Jed Clampett: I don't believe I know Fred.
- Shorty Kellems: He'll make a fortune outta that silver mine. Plans to hide a still in there and sell moonshine.
- Daisy Moses: Shorty, did you ever take any silver outta that mine?
- Shorty Kellems: Just once. Found a spoon somebody dropped.
- Milburn Drysdale: Allow me to present you with this box of cigars.
- Jed Clampett: Well thank you. What's the occasion?
- Milburn Drysdale: Wait till you hear. Now, listen to this: Mr. Clampett, at this moment, you have now got $90 million.
- Jethro Bodine: [Jethro enters] Howdy Mr. Drysdale.
- Milburn Drysdale: Jethro
- Jed Clampett: Hey, Jethro, guess what I got?
- Jethro Bodine: What?
- Jed Clampett: A box of cigars.