Irene Ryan credited as playing...
Daisy Moses
- Daisy Moses: Lots of folk outfitted their boys during the great war. That was the war twixt the North and the South, the Yellow and the Gray. The Gray really won, you know,
- Daisy Moses: These are the soft gentle hands of a healer.
- Jethro Bodine: They is about as soft as a gator's hide!
- Daisy Moses: Jed, fetch my medical bag.
- Jed Clampett: Are you hurt, Granny?
- Daisy Moses: No, it's for the general.
- [Jethro is dressed like Patton]
- Jethro Bodine: I ain't hurt.
- Daisy Moses: I ain't down there yet.
- Daisy Moses: Jed, how in the name of Stonewall Jackson can the army give him two guns and a tank, when he's dangerous enough with a knife and fork?
- Milburn Drysdale: Granny, he'll be examined by an army doctor.
- Daisy Moses: Oh no. It was one of them goobers that killed Jed's cousin!
- Milburn Drysdale: An army doctor?
- Daisy Moses: High-rankin' one too, General Peritonitis.