Miranda Richardson credited as playing...
Nurse Mary
- Nurse Mary: [in bed together, Nurse Mary is asking Blackadder whether he has a girl back home in England] And no casual girlfriends?
- Captain Blackadder: Skirt? Ha! If only. When I joined up we were still fighting colonial wars. If you saw someone in a skirt you shot him and nicked his country.
- Nurse Mary: When this war is over, do you think we might get to know each other a little better?
- Captain Blackadder: Yes, why not? When this madness has finished, perhaps we could go cycling together. Take a trip down to the old Swan at Henley and go for a walk in the woods.
- Nurse Mary: Yes. Or we could just do it right now on the desk.
- Captain Blackadder: Yeah, OK.
- [Blackadder thinks Nurse Mary is a German spy]
- Captain Blackadder: And then the final, irrefutable proof. Remember, you mentioned a clever boyfriend...
- Nurse Mary: Yes.
- Captain Blackadder: I then leapt on the opportunity to test you. I asked if he'd been to one of the great universities, Oxford, Cambridge, or Hull.
- Nurse Mary: Well?
- Captain Blackadder: You failed to spot that only two of those are great Universities.
- Nurse Mary: Swine!
- General Melchett: That's right! Oxford's a complete dump!
- Nurse Mary: Cigarette?
- Captain Blackadder: No thank you, I only smoke cigarettes after making love. So back in England I'm a twenty-a-day man.