Regina King credited as playing...
Huey Freeman • Riley Freeman
- Huey: What the hell is wrong with you people? Every famous nigga that gets arrested is not Nelson Mandela! Yes, the government conspires to put a lot of innocent black men in jail on fallacious charges. But R. Kelly is *not* one of those men! We all *know* the nigga can sing, but what happened to standards? What happened to bare minimums? Are you a fan of R. Kelly? You wanna help R. Kelly? Get some counseling for R. Kelly! Introduce him to some older women! Hide his camcorder! But don't pretend that the man is a hero!... And stop the damn dancing! Act like you've got some goddamn sense, people! Damn! I'm through playing around here!
- Riley: If I were to piss on you right now would you A, smile and ask for more; or B, get the hell out of the way?
- Tom Dubois: [about the R. Kelly sex tape] Riley, she was a little girl.
- Riley: Oh, I saw that girl. She wasn't little. I'm little. Gary Coleman's little. Mini-Me is little. And to the best of my knowledge, we all managed to avoid gettin' peed on so far!
- Tom Dubois: But what about the victim!
- Riley: Oh yes! The victim. At what point does personal responsibility become a factor in this equation? I see piss comin' I run. She saw piss comin' she stayed. And why should I miss out on the next R. Kelly album *just* fo' that?
- [walks away]
- Huey: Man, you just beat by an eight-year old.
- Riley: [from afar] And if R. Kelly goes to jail, I'ma piss on yo' cat!
- Huey: I did battle with ignorance today, and ignorance won. I admit that I'm often... vexed at the behavior of my own people. Yeah, "vexed" is a good word.
- [last lines]
- Huey: One thing for sure, though. Can't blame this one on the white man. What am I saying? Of course I can.
- Huey: You do what you can to help black folks, and they make you wonder why you even bother. But they're our people, and we gotta love 'em regardless.