Ted Levine credited as playing...
Stottlemeyer
- [after receiving a compliment from Julian Hodge about his looks, Randy has taken to wearing expensive suits]
- Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: Where's your notebook?
- Lt. Randall Disher: Oh, I don't have one. It's an Italian suit, it was ruining the lining. But don't worry.
- [points to his head]
- Lt. Randall Disher: I'll remember it.
- [Monk proves that Natasia Zorelle's death was murder]
- Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: Okay! This is now a homicide investigation! Lock this place down, nobody touch anything!
- [turning to Randy]
- Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: Fabio, go and borrow a notebook, and borrow a pencil, and start talking to neighbors.
- Natalie Teeger: Captain, what do you think it means?
- Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: It means that your boss scared somebody.
- [as Stottlemeyer and Natalie leave, no one seems to notice Monk adding a wart to Natasia's left shoulder, to match up with the one on her other shoulder]
- Natalie Teeger: She swears he's innocent.
- Howard "Gordo" Gordon: I know. That's the toughest part of the job, the mothers crying and pleading. That's one thing I'm not going to miss.
- Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: Where are you going?
- Howard "Gordo" Gordon: Didn't you hear? I'm retiring. There's a party for me on Saturday if you want to come.
- Lt. Randall Disher: Sweet.
- Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: You're retiring? How old are you?
- Howard "Gordo" Gordon: 46.
- Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: Did you win the lottery?
- Howard "Gordo" Gordon: No, I've been investing. Real estate. What have you been doing with your savings?
- Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: [mulls it over] Uhhh... Eating. You know, I think I need to talk to my accountant.
- Natalie Teeger: What, you have an accountant?
- Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: Nope. Going to have to go find an accountant, and then I'm going to talk to him.