Mark Harmon: Leroy Jethro Gibbs

Left for Dead

Leroy Jethro Gibbs

[Tony needs a place to stay for the night]
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: You remember when I stayed with you that time, when it didn't really go so well?
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Yeah. I remember, DiNozzo.
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Well, listen. I was younger then. Immature, a little unfocused...
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: It was six months ago, Tony.

Abby Sciuto: Gotcha!
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: I love to hear that word out of your dark lips, Abby.
Abby Sciuto: Hey guys. What's you'd find?
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Kate willing to give her bedroom to Jane Doe. But not me.
Abby Sciuto: [mockingly] Shocking.

Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: What do you got, DiNozzo?
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Motorist picked up a Jane Doe in Rock Creek Park. Claimed she dug herself out of a grave. No ID. And guess what?
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: She can't remember her name.
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Yeah. How'd you know that?
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Well, uh, she's alive and you're calling her "Jane Doe". What was my first clue?

[talking about his eyesight instead of working]
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: 20/10, same as Ted Williams. He could see the seams on a fastball coming at him.
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: How 'bout knuckles?

Dr. Donald 'Ducky' Mallard: It's not very deep.
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Hastily-dug graves rarely are.
Dr. Donald 'Ducky' Mallard: Do you know why graves are six feet deep, Gibbs?
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: I do.
Dr. Donald 'Ducky' Mallard: Yeah, six feet is the minimum depth at which the smell of a decomposing corpse cannot attract wild animals. Of course, there are exceptions. A polar bear can smell...
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Duck, I said I knew.

Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: [at the crime scene] Okay, let's get to work.
Dr. Donald 'Ducky' Mallard: I don't have a body!
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Go find one, Duck.
Dr. Donald 'Ducky' Mallard: Here?
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Sure, how many times have we had multiple victims?
Dr. Donald 'Ducky' Mallard: Quite right, Jethro.
[Ducky walks off. Tony chuckles slightly]
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: That's slick, Boss.
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: What's that?
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Getting Ducky off, so he won't bug us with stories about the...
[Gibbs stares at him]
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: We better get back to work.

Dr. Donald 'Ducky' Mallard: Jethro, I don't answer forensics questions I don't know the answers to. You know that. Why do you keep asking me?
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Force of habit.

Abby Sciuto: So I suppose you want me to find out what chastity belt this opens.
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Do I look like DiNozzo?
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Not funny, Boss. Besides, I could open a chastity belt.
Abby Sciuto: Have you ever seen one? Mine's *awesome!* It's 18th century French.
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: You have a chastity belt?
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: So much more information than I need to know, Abby. And not enough about this key.

Dr. Stephen Bauer: [watching the prototype search for bombs] In the beginning, she had some limited success, but Dr. Rutger has rewritten the software to
[a bomb explodes]
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: I had a hunting dog like that once.

Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: What is with the Germans and the alphabet thing? BMW, BMG, BASF - and they're all B's.
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: I'm resisting the urge to say cut the BS.

Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: She's bonding.
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Kate and Jane Doe?
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Oh, yeah. She hasn't even questioned her yet. Her eyes pleaded for help.
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Love that look in a woman.

Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: [speaking of Dr Bauer] That son of a bitch is guilty as hell.

Dr. Stephen Bauer: You think terrorists killed him?
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: These days, I look for terrorists behind most everything!

Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Got all teary eyed over a body she didn't know?
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: She's a nice lady, Gibbs!
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Oh yeah, so you keep telling me.