Mark Harmon: Leroy Jethro Gibbs

One Shot, One Kill

Leroy Jethro Gibbs

[Gibbs has three ex-wives]
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Hey, DiNozzo, kinda reminds me of your apartment. 'Cept for that minty fresh urine smell.
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: For your information, I have a maid now.
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: You can afford a maid?
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: It's amazing what you can do when you don't have to pay three alimonies.

Major Dorden: Your whole plan rests on this guy believing that you're both Marines.
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: We have it under control, Major. She'll do fine.
Major Dorden: Well, then I'll just stay and help out. There's nothing wrong with another set of eyeballs.
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Not a good idea. The best thing you can do is leave this to us.
Major Dorden: I lost two of my men to this psycho. You really think I'm passing up on a chance for payback?
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Major, your mission is to protect our country. Our mission right now is to protect you and your Marines. Allow us the honor of doing our job.

Agent Caitlin 'Kate' Todd: Next time drive a little faster, Tony. I think my glands have an ounce of adrenaline left.
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Response to a crime scene investigation demands a timely arrival, Kate.
Agent Caitlin 'Kate' Todd: It would help if the investigators didn't PUKE all over the crime scene.
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Brings back memories.
Agent Caitlin 'Kate' Todd: Memories of what?
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Marriage.

[reviewing Alvarez' complaint file]
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: You'll like this one, Boss. One guy wanted to be a paramedic, so Alvarez guaranteed him the Corps would train him to save lives.
[Gibbs and Tony share a laugh]
Agent Caitlin 'Kate' Todd: What's wrong with that?
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: The Marine Corps doesn't have medical personnel.
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: They're all Navy.
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Technically, it is correct. I mean, Marines do save lives - mostly through the use of superior firepower.

Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Can we hurry it up. Don't think Gunnery Sergeant Alvarez would appreciate being seen like this.
Dr. Donald 'Ducky' Mallard: You *knew* the man?
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Nope.
[Gibbs walks away. Ducky talks to the corpse]
Dr. Donald 'Ducky' Mallard: If it's any consolation, Gunny, Gibbs is the absolute *best* we have.

Agent Caitlin 'Kate' Todd: We can get the trajectory, no problem.
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: The competition's gonna be for the bullet.
Dr. Donald 'Ducky' Mallard: I don't think the unfortunate Staff Sergeant Allen isn't going to be much use there. The bullet passed clean through.
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Then I suggest we help our "good friends", the FBI, find it. Tony, make a hole.
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: [to Ducky] Scalpel.
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Kate, find the bullet.

Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Well, you think I could pass for a marine?
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: I don't know, let's shave your head and find out.

Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Oh boy! We've got a *major* problem!
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: What do you see?
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: A shooter who is highly intelligent, and methodical. Out of a thousand bricks on this wall, he only removed the one he needed.