Bronson Pinchot credited as playing...
Balki Bartokomous
- Balki Bartokomous: Larry, Larry, Larry! I look everywhere for you! I walk the streets, I search the alleys, I say to everyone, 'Have you seen Larry?' You don't know how many people have never heard of you! But now I find you and I'm safe, I'm safe, I'm safe!
- Larry Appleton: Yes, yes, now you're safe! Who are you?
- Balki Bartokomous: I am Balki Bartokomous! Philo, my fifth cousin three times removed is the step-uncle to your father on my mother's side, two continents removed.
- Larry Appleton: I see, so we're sort of related by rumor.
- Balki Bartokomous: Color TV!
- Larry Appleton: Yeah, haven't you ever seen color TV before?
- Balki Bartokomous: [lying] Of course I have, don't be ridiculous...
- [in awe]
- Balki Bartokomous: BLUE!
- Larry Appleton: Well, I'm going to turn in. Green and red are going to be on later, you might want to stay up and watch.
- Balki Bartokomous: You don't know what kind of good fellow you dumping to the birds! He was always loyal to you, he make everything perfect for you and you won't find anyone to do better! His only mistake was to be good friend to me. But the customer likes him and that's why they come back! And if you let this good person walk out that door you're makin' one big mistake, ghostbuster!
- Customer #1: You're the man in charge, aren't you?
- Balki Bartokomous: Of course I am, don't be ridiculous, bring it over here.
- [pause]
- Balki Bartokomous: I'm not allowed to move.
- Balki Bartokomous: What that?
- Larry Appleton: Pink lemonade.
- Balki Bartokomous: [amazed] You have pink lemons?
- Balki Bartokomous: Am I in debt?
- Larry Appleton: Yes.
- Balki Bartokomous: [proudly] I really am an American!