Tony Curtis credited as playing...
Danny Wilde • Aunt Sophie Schwartz
- Danny Wilde: You know, your Uncle didn't have a lot of friends, it looks like.
- Lord Brett Sinclair: No, he uh, he kept himself very much to himself. Especially after his dishonourable discharge from the army.
- Danny Wilde: What happened?
- Lord Brett Sinclair: Oh, he uh, broke through the lines of a German supply dump. Blew up three ammunition trains, six tanks and uh, killed or wounded at least 350 Germans.
- Danny Wilde: Did he do that all by himself?
- Lord Brett Sinclair: Uh huh.
- Danny Wilde: Did they give him a medal or anything?
- Lord Brett Sinclair: No. It was uh, three months after the war ended.
- Danny Wilde: [Brett enters the main hall of the Sinclairs' ancestral home and is surprised by Danny, hiding behind a suit of armor and wearing its helmet] Helloooo... Welcome, good knight! Dost thou bring thy sword to aid the king?
- Lord Brett Sinclair: Daniel, what on Earth are you doing here?
- Danny Wilde: How'd you know it was me? I'm here because you invited me.
- Lord Brett Sinclair: I did?
- Danny Wilde: Yes, you did.
- Lord Brett Sinclair: Uh... when did I invite you?
- Danny Wilde: When did you invite me?
- Lord Brett Sinclair: Yes.
- Danny Wilde: How many times have you said to me, "Why don't you come out and spend the weekend with me?" You must have said it a hundred times?
- Lord Brett Sinclair: Yes, of course ...
- Danny Wilde: So I finally show up, so here I am ...
- Lord Brett Sinclair: Any special reason, this particular weekend?
- Danny Wilde: What special reason do I need? I'm your friend, right?
- Lord Brett Sinclair: Well, of course you are ...
- Danny Wilde: Well, I'm here to see your incestral home.
- Lord Brett Sinclair: *Ancestral.*
- Kate Sinclair: [Brett's Uncle Angus has just been squashed flat by a falling courtyard door, the latest in a string of murders of Brett's relatives] Poor Uncle Angus. Meanest man I ever met. Probably worth millions.
- Danny Wilde: Imagine. All that money and he died flat.
- Lord Brett Sinclair: Well, uh, as someone once said, "To lose one relative is misfortune. To lose two is carelessness."
- Kate Sinclair: Oscar Wilde.
- Lord Brett Sinclair: Thank you. But I have lost six. Which is absolute, downright negligence!