Lindsay Sloane credited as playing...
Valerie Birkhead
- Valerie: [to Harvey while surfing with his VR glasses on] Wow, that's amazing... You can look dorky in this realm *too*!
- Valerie: Hi, Libby.
- Libby Chessler: Ew.
- Valerie: Why doesn't she like me?
- Sabrina Spellman: I'm thinking it's a thyroid problem.
- Valerie: Sabrina? Sabrina? Where did she go?
- Libby Chessler: A nerd ditched by a freak. It's like a movie of the week.
- Quizmaster Albert: [to Sabrina] Mortals don't have a lot of restraint when it comes to magic... or firearms. Quiz you later.
- Valerie: Hey. Pop out the way you popped in, with all that lightning-and-smoke stuff.
- Quizmaster Albert: [to Sabrina] See what I mean? I blame television.
- Valerie: My guy's funny, he can really move and he's so cute.
- Sabrina Spellman: The Dalai Lama can dance?
- Sabrina Spellman: Being a witch is so much more fun when you can tell your friends.
- Valerie: You're so lucky. The only secret I have is that I'm allergic to watermelon. Well, that's out.