In the opening monologue, Rudolph Guiliani (Darrel Hammond) records campaign endorses; in the opening monologue, Eric McCormick states that he's anything but gay; one-legged Amber competes on The Bachelor; Rachel Dratch goes into a destructive rage when losing a game of Celebrity; political campaigns ask the viewers to personally call the candidates on the phone; Paula Zahn (Tina Fey) falls in love; On Weekend Update, Gene Shalit (Horatio Sans) makes cheesy puns for current movies; a councilman appears on Joey Mack's radio show; John Hancock insurance is sold for the worst of the worst-case scenarios; Johnny Knoxville (McCormick) stars in Jackass: The Musical; a barmaid (Maya Rudolph) sets Reggie (Tracy Morgan) straight on his stories; Jay-Z performs "Guns & Roses" with Lenny Kravitz and "'03 Bonnie & Clyde" with Beyoncé.
—E-Ric