Garry Shandling credited as playing...
Larry Sanders
- Larry Sanders: Maybe we need a new chair adjuster. Have you ever thought of that?
- Arthur: Yeah...
- Larry Sanders: Because someone has been sitting in my chair.
- Hank Kingsley: Maybe it's Momma Bear.
- Hank Kingsley: Talentless fat fuck! Just worry about your couch and trying not to fuck up. Alright?
- Stevie Grant: Roseanne is actually sleeping here while you get better? That's... just blows my mind.
- Larry Sanders: Yeah.
- Stevie Grant: WHY? Did you pull her out of a burning building in some point, or did you sit through "She-Devil"?
- Phil: You know, uh it hurt me when you rejected my Gay of Angeles joke.
- Larry Sanders: Oh come on. That skecth was over-the-top, there was a character named Jerry Fagwell in it...
- Roseanne: Larry, this is not the time to be judgemental.
- Larry Sanders: You didn't... you didn't see it, there was a piece of garbage that sketch. You'd probably like it. As I recall, it was just...
- Roseanne: This is not about *me*! Okay? I'm here to help *you*! I'm not the one with the pill problem. You self-destructive asshole.
- Larry Sanders: But I do have a small, very tiny...
- Roseanne: Addiction.
- Larry Sanders: Addiction to prescription painkillers.
- Roseanne: Drugs.
- Larry Sanders: Yeah but prescription nonetheless. And I think it's the ones anybody can get or probably did, anybody takes.
- Roseanne: Addicts.
- Larry Sanders: Why is everybody asking me if everything is okay today? I mean uh...
- Arthur: And they say television people don't care...
- Larry Sanders: I'm under a lot of pressure. I host a late night talk-show every night. Have you any idea of the demands that that are?
- Roseanne: No, not all. I only have a Top 10 show, and I was abused as a kid, I spent time in a nuthouse and sucking marriages, and last week Weekly World News ran my head on the body of a dog. Absolutely, I have no fucking idea.
- Larry Sanders: I see. So your show is still on the Top 10 huh?
- Roseanne: Yeah... until they run that "Frasier" guy against us.
- Larry Sanders: I can't stand up the whole show show, can I? Then I'd be uh...
- Phil: Alex Trebek.
- Larry Sanders: Alex Trebek.