William Christopher credited as playing...
Father Francis Mulcahy
- Capt. Benjamin Franklin "Hawkeye" Pierce: I have stuffing that's just aching to be hugged.
- Father Francis Mulcahy: What can I say, Hawkeye. Some guys got it and some guys don't.
- Col. Sherman T. Potter: So I said, "Back up a bit. What is it you did that's got everybody's tongue wagging except mine?" She said "I had an unhappy love affair." So I said, "was it one of my doctors?" And she said "no, it was your priest!"
- Father Francis Mulcahy: Colonel, you must understand. She's very upset.
- Col. Sherman T. Potter: That's what she said!