Gary Burghoff credited as playing...
Cpl. Walter 'Radar' O'Reilly
- Corporal Walter Eugene O'Reilly: You guys mind if I have a drink?
- Captain Benjamin Franklin Pierce: No. Go ahead.
- Captain B.J. Hunnicut: I thought your liver was still a virgin.
- Corporal Walter Eugene O'Reilly: Don't be silly, I'm a man.
- [takes a sip and gasps]
- Captain Benjamin Franklin Pierce: And you thought we enjoyed this stuff.
- Corporal Walter Eugene O'Reilly: I thought this stuff was supposed to make you feel better.
- Captain B.J. Hunnicut: No, it's supposed to make you feel nothing.
- Corporal Walter Eugene O'Reilly: And in this corner, wearing pink pedal pushers, a polka-dot blouse, and a swell cherry hat, from Toledo, Ohio, Corporal Max "I'll do anything to get out" Klinger!