Stockard Channing credited as playing...
Abbey Bartlet
- President Josiah Bartlet: [trying to wake up his wife] Abbey... Abigail... Abbey, the kids are eating sugar.
- Abbey Bartlet: Uh...
- [wakes up]
- Abbey Bartlet: Oh!
- President Josiah Bartlet: How you doing? You know I gave the kids candy all the time, right?
- Abbey Bartlet: Behind my back?
- President Josiah Bartlet: Yes.
- Abbey Bartlet: You bought their love.
- President Josiah Bartlet: Well, it was for sale, and I wanted it.
- President Josiah "Jed" Bartlet: I walked to school every morning in weather colder than this.
- Abbey Bartlet: From the headmaster's house to your classroom.
- President Josiah "Jed" Bartlet: That's right, baby. Just a camel hair coat, leather gloves, a varsity scarf, and these wits.
- Abbey Bartlet: [the President has decided to change the Use of Force Doctrine after watching a Laurel & Hardy movie] Because of Laurel and Hardy?
- President Josiah "Jed" Bartlet: Not because, no. Not *because* of Laurel and Hardy. That was simply the confluence of the final... you know, and also, by the way, from the mouths of babes... like yourself... Seriously, from the mouths of babes and clowns comes... Listen, there's no reason why anyone needs to know about Laurel and Hardy.
- Abbey Bartlet: Sounds like that's going to depend a lot on my general mood.